


Storms

by Alondere



Series: From My Requests! [6]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bad Parent Lyall Lupin, Blood and Gore, Body Horror, Bottom Remus Lupin, Dark Sirius Black, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Gay Remus Lupin, Gay Sirius Black, Good Regulus Black, Lyall Lupin Bashing, M/M, Master Sirius, Master/Servant, Regulus Black Lives, Regulus Black is a Good Sibling, Slave Remus, Top Sirius Black, its only a few chapters, listen, slave AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-17 19:55:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 35,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28979967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alondere/pseuds/Alondere
Summary: Remus is a servant who keeps being brought back, bought by Sirius, who is notorious among the servants for being sadistic.  Remus doesn’t know if he’ll even survive the next month, neither of them expected the turn of events that blew them both off of their feet.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: From My Requests! [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1944721
Comments: 14
Kudos: 59





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tehee](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Tehee).



> I’m so sorry for the end of this, it gets so much better, I swear. Ahm, I was drunk when I can up with the ideas for this, it is a request. I’m sorry, it’ll get better, I know that this is not entirely what you asked for. I’ll rewrite it if you want.

Sirius stepped out of the Ministry owned car. He’d decided when he got in that what his mother didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her, this was more important anyway. Besides, cars weren’t too bad. He straightened his robes and walked into the market, stopping by the desk to check in with the woman behind it.

He wondered as she leaned over, showing off how low-cut her tight shirt was, if she was supposed to dress and act this way. He averted his eyes, making sure that if she wasn’t, she could tell he wasn’t interested.

“Just go down the hall, third door to the left, Mr. Folgens will be with you in a moment.”

Sirius nodded curtly and walked through the door, playing with the ring on his pinky, an heirloom from his father. 

He walked down the hallway and found the office he was supposed to be in, hoping he wouldn’t be long. His mother would have a fit if she knew what he was doing. It wasn’t supposed to be good for her declining heart, either, not with his father dying the previous month.

It seemed, the sicker she got, the more psychotic she acted.

“Ah, Mr. Black! I didn’t expect to see you here again.”

Sirius was pulled out of his thoughts by the man in the doorway. He stood up and shook hands with the portly man, explaining, “I need just one more. The last one... well, is gone now. It was rather embarrassing, I mixed the wrong roots together.”

Mr. Folgens shifted his weight to his other foot, looking a bit uncomfortable. “Is that right?”

Sirius’ eyes narrowed. He didn’t like the sudden nervousness of the balding man before him, how his eyes darted to the door, then the window, and back.

“It was nothing to worry about, I’ve come for another,” he said coldly.

Mr. Folgens met Sirius’ eye and said, “Of course. If you’ll come this way, we can find one for you. Only the best for you, Mr. Black.”

Sirius followed the man down the hall, looking into the rooms and keeping an eye on the people being presented. If he was lucky, he wouldn’t have to sit through an presentation of servants he had no interest in.

Sirius stopped. “Solonto, come back.”

Mr. Folgens stopped dead and rushed back, also hoping to get Sirius out as soon as possible.

Sirius pointed at the man who caught his eye, just as he caught said person’s eye. Sirius saw the light of recognition in his eye and smirked. He was about to ruin this man’s whole life. He knew it.

He leaned in to Mr. Folgens. “How much is that one,” he asked, taking in the scars that decorated the servants face, his pale looking skin. His eyes seemed almost yellow from here and Sirius could spot him wincing, though he was trying to hide it. A werewolf, it seemed.

The full moon was in one day.

“O-oh you don’t want that one. He’s only here for—“

“Am I not saying I want him? Bring him, and only him to my usual room. Take him out of that presentation and into mine immediately. Don’t let anyone buy him.”

Sirius had spoken without taking his eyes off of the servant, who was still staring at him, looking like he was trying to beg Sirius not to buy him with his eyes.

Sirius only smirked back and stood there until Mr. Folgens came back, a file in hand. Sirius saw the man’s face fall when he saw the file and winked at him, happy to make him even more fearful.

Sirius turned and walked away, Mr. Folgens handed him a file that he flipped open as he entered the room and sat down in his chair, which was next to a small table. “Remus Lupin? His parents must have been begging for him to be bitten.”

Folgens laughed nervously and left the room, making sure to put the papers Sirius would have to sign on the table next to his firewhiskey, something he usually had when in this place. Sirius looked up as a door opened off the side and Remus was thrust into the room. He lost his balance and fell, Sirius could tell he was too weak to stay upright.

“Hm. They work fast,” he said to the room at large.

Sirius leaned back and watched Remus straighten up and take in his surroundings, seeing his surprise at being alone with Sirius. He saw fear and resignation cross his face, too. He gave him a moment, taking his time to put the papers down on the table and take a sip of his drink.

“Stand in front of me.”

Remis stepped forward, walking until he was in front of Sirius. He stopped, chin high and glaring at Sirius unblinkingly.

“Wipe that look off your face or I’ll do it for you.”

Sirius leaned forward and watched Remus’ chin jut out a bit in defiance. Sirius hit him with a stinging hex, making him flinch and stop glaring at him. Sirius smirked up at him and tugged on his shirt. “This. Off.”

Remus lifted his hands and started to unbutton his shirt, still not speaking. When all of the buttons were undone, he shrugged off the shirt and held it at his side. Sirius took in the map of scars that decorated his entire torso. He traced one interestedly and then leaned back again.

“Where’d you get them?”

Remus closed his eyes and sighed. “My mother’s a muggle. She was driving with me and she crashed.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Hm. What of your parents?”

“They died,” Remus answered shortly.

“Your father was in the car with you two? I got the impression he wasn’t.”

There was a pause in which they stared at each other.

“I should have been more clear. Yes, he was.”

Sirius noticed his right index finger twitch and his eyes dart to Sirius’ forehead when he lied.

Sirius shifted in his chair a bit. “What’s your height?”

“Six- three.“

“Weight?”

“One twenty-five.”

“Blood status?”

“Half.”

“Are you a virgin?”

Remus paused. “Yes.”

Sirius took another small sip of his whiskey. “I mean no sexual contact at all. You haven’t even kissed?”

Remus nodded, Sirius’ eyes went to his right index finger, and then his eyes, as Remus said, “Yes, I’m a virgin.”

He wasn’t lying. Sirius finished off his glass and poured himself another one.

“Schooling?”

“Self taught.”

“How well?”

Remus thought about it. “I understand the theories behind magic, things like that, I can do—“

Sirius raised an eyebrow and stared up at Remus. “Yes?”

Another pause.

Remus ran his hands through his hair. “Occulmens, I’m an Occulmens,” he muttered.

Sirius took another sip of his firewhiskey. This was going to be a long afternoon. “What else,” he prodded.

Remus tilted his head. “What?”

“You cut yourself off, and for some reason, bear with me here, I don’t think you were going to say that you’re an Occulmens. What. Else?”

Sirius’ eyes traveled down to Remus’ arms again, where he was rolling his wrist. His hands were in fists.

Sirius looked back up to Remus’ face and saw his cheeks were pink and his eyes were on the door.

Finally, he murmured without moving his lips, “I can do wandless magic.”

Both of Sirius’ eyebrows went up. “How well?”

Remus’ eyes went to Sirius’ face and back to the door. “Well enough.”

Sirius downed the shot of firewhiskey and poured himself another glass. “If you don’t tell me exactly what you can do, I’m afraid I’ll have to tell Mr. Folgens and leave you here to him.”

Remus’ eyes went wide and back to Sirius, before going to the door and back to Sirius again. He exhaled through his nose. “I can do most spells and I read about a tribe in Africa who can do pyrokinetics. I can light something on fire if I try and I can summon lights, there are a few other things, but they’re hard to explain.”

Sirius smirked up at Remus. “Anything else?”

Remus shook his head. Sirius noticed where his eyes were and his finger twitching. “Don’t lie.”

Remus shook his head again. Sirius got out his wand and traced it up one of the silvery scars running up his Remus’ torso. “I mean it. Occulmency is quite easy to get through if you really, really, want to.”

Remus’ eyes moved to the side before he closed them. “Spells. I can do a lot of spells,” Sirius raised an eyebrow, waiting for Remus to continue, “...I can apparate without a wand.”

The smile left Sirius’ face. “You can _what_?”

Remus took a step back, which Sirius responded to by standing up. He had an entire three inches on Remus, so he stalked forward and pointed his wand at Remus’ neck. “And you were just not going to tell me?”

Remus nodded and moved to the side, where the door he came through was. “That was the plan. There are spells on this building that prevent me from doing it. One of the reasons I keep getting returned. They don’t know how I’m getting places,” he nervously explained.

“ _Crucio_.”

Remus fell to the ground and tried to scream, but Sirius knelt down quickly and put one hand over his mouth and the other on his throat, blocking out any screams.

“Shhh. You don’t want me to have to tell them what you’ve done, do you?”

Remus closed his eyes. Sirius felt tears touch his hand and smirked. He was surprised when he could feel himself getting harder and harder as each tear reached his hand. Usually, it took a lot more than a curse.

He lifted his wand, making Remus’ throat work against his hand in a silent scream, then he lowered it, making Remus relax under his hands. Sirius felt heavy puffs of breath reach his palm.

“So, I think some wards are in order. You’re smarter than the people here want to give you credit for. It’s actually extremely impressive. I’m going to buy you, did you have a wand when you came here?”

Remus nodded his head. Sirius felt his throat working against his hand, he was having trouble breathing. He let his hand up.

“I’m going to let you in on a little secret. They don’t snap your wands here. They say they do so you can’t learn wandless magic and summon them. It’s also why they don’t want you learning wandless magic.”

Remus’ eyes went wide with rage. He still couldn’t talk, but Sirius thought he could make out one or two of the muffled words against his hand.

“You’re not coming back. I’m going to get your wand, I’ll be using you as a test subject for many, many experiments. You may need it once or twice.”

Remus nodded slowly. Sirius could practically see his mind working out how best to use this opportunity to escape.

“You will either spend most of your time in my room or my office, I’ll explain why in the car.”

Remus nodded and closed his eyes, falling back as Sirius got back up and went to the table. 

He pulled the papers to him and signed, skimming over the contract to make sure nothing had changed. He flipped the paper and put the date, put down Remus’ name and ID number, and signed again.

He put the papers down and looked over at Remus, who had one scarred hand over his eyes. He’d put his shirt back on.

“ _Incarcerous_.”

Remus’ hands flew together along with his feet. Sirius waved his wand again and Remus was gagged, too.

Sirius walked from the room and found Mr. Folgens, handing him the paper.

“I need his wand.”

Mr. Folgens’ eyes went wide. “His- his wand?”

“Yes. Give it to me,” Sirius demanded.

“Surely, you realize we snap their wands so they can’t escape?”

Mr. Folgens seemed to think that Sirius would bring Remus back, too.

“Don’t give me that rubbish. We both know that there’s a room—“

“Fine! Fine,” Mr. Folgens looked around nervously, “I’ll get it.”

Sirius nodded and turned, walking back to his room.

Remus was still on the floor, bound and gagged, and staring up at Sirius resentfully. Sirius knelt down and gave him the first real once over he got all day. 

He really was quite fit, the more Sirius looked at him. He was thin, yes, but not too thin, and besides, he’d be putting on some weight with Sirius. Sirius ran a hand through his hair and sighed. It was soft and fluffy, just the right length, long, but not as long as his own, which came down to his shoulders.

There was a light dusting of freckles across his nose, from cheek to cheek. His lips were plump but not too plump, just enough to bite if Sirius really wanted to.

His eyes were the color of sun kissed honey, the prettiest amber Sirius had ever seen, under the tinted yellow. They were framed by long auburn lashes that touched Remus’ cheekbone when he blinked. He looked like an angel.

Sirius was going to enjoy corrupting him.

Mr. Folgens came back with Remus’ wand in a discreet bag and set down another paper.

“Sign this here. You can’t bring him back, now, because you want it.”

Sirius nodded and tore his eyes from Remus, who he heard let out an audible sigh of relief.

Sirius bent over and signed the contract, picking up the bag and waving his own wand. The ropes fell from Remus’ wrists and ankles. He slowly got up, trying not to stumble too badly.

Sirius was at his side, holding out his arm, which Remus gladly took. Sirius let Remus put his weight on him and started to walk, handing him the bag.

“Don’t open it,” he muttered.

Remus nodded and closed his eyes, opening them again a few seconds later. They walked out and Remus let go of Sirius’ arm, so Sirius took the bag back. He wasn’t getting it anytime soon, not until Sirius had a clearer idea of his skill set.

They got to the car and Sirius held open the door for him. Remus climbed in, moving to the opposite window. Sirius laughed softly at his naïvety and said, “Get in the middle. I don’t trust you not to jump out.”

Remus moved to the middle seat. The car started to move, and Sirius started speaking, Remus still eyeing the package in his lap. They were facing each other.

“Here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to live between my room and my office. That means you’ll stay in my bedroom until I need you in my office.”

Remus nodded.

“I’m going to keep your wand with me. I won’t snap it or break it. You can have it when I need you to have it, or when I want you to practice something, but you can’t keep it with you at all times.”

Remus nodded again.

“Do you know who I am?”

Remus’ eyes flicked to Sirius’. “I know you’re a Black, I’m just praying you’re Regulus.”

Sirius smirked. “Why is that?”

Remus backed up a little. “Regulus can be terrible, but I’ve heard from... the others that Sirius is the one to be feared. Apparently he takes after his mother.”

Sirius narrowed his eyes. “One, Regulus is never terrible, it’s his biggest weakness,” Sirius watched Remus back up farther, his eyes go terrified, “Two, do you want to repeat that last sentence to me again?”

Remus shook his head, quickly apologizing. “I’m sorry.”

Sirius leaned back and crossed his arms. “What did you mean by it?”

Remus closed his eyes. This would be the end of him and he knew it. “She’s, apparently, sadistic and psychotic.”

Sirius smirked. “She is. And I grew up, learning from her knee. I perfected her techniques, found ways around the setbacks that she didn’t dare try to get around. I’ve learned how to kill someone without actually killing them, how to heal someone quickly, I’ve even fed one of our servants his own heart, I was able to heal him before he died. She was always terrified of getting dirty, I have no problem with it, if anything, I enjoy it. I am actually worse than my mother, much, _much_ , worse.”

He saw Remus shudder and move back a little more. He was almost at the door to the car.

“Get back to where I told you to be.”

Remus froze and moved forward, right in front of Sirius, who moved so he was closer to Remus.

“My mother doesn’t know about you.”

Remus’ eyes went wide. He opened his mouth to speak, but Sirius beat him to it. “She’s confined to her room. Her heart is going out, she’ll be dead in months. However, that doesn’t mean she stays in her room, unfortunately for you. My brother had no idea about you either. You won’t be seen by anyone, not even the other servants or the house-elf. Regulus will likely figure this out within the week, he’s very smart.”

Remus nodded, he needed to keep Sirius happy. “So, just hide in your room?”

“Yes. If someone comes in, you’ll have a ten second head start. Get under my bed, no where else. You’ll be sleeping next to or on my bed depending on my mood.”

Remus nodded. “Anything you want to tell me? Say... about a certain story you told me?”

Remis flinched at the sudden change in Sirius’ voice. He averted his eyes. “If you tell me now, I may not even be that angry, I’ll be angry, yes, but you can play for some lenience.”

Remus moved back a little and turned his head away. “I may have lied about where the scars came from,” he muttered.

Sirius moved closer and hooked his finger under Remus’ chin. Their eyes met. “Where are they really from?”

Remus muttered something unintelligible.

Sirius pointed his wand at Remus. “Where are they really from?”

Remus said it a little louder. “I-I’m a werewolf.”

Sirius only leaned in, an inch from Remus’ face, and said, “I know you are. Do you know what could have happened if I had no idea? Forget the trouble you’d be in, jf you killed me, or worse, turned me? I’d have killed you. The full moon is _tomorrrow_.”

Remus tried to back away again, stopped when Sirius grabbed his arm. “How would a werewolf react to an Animagus?”

Remus tried to pull his arm from Sirius’ grasp, “I have no idea.”

Sirius grabbed Remus’ other arm, “Would it hurt much to try?”

Remus stopped struggling. “I wouldn’t know.”

Sirius leaned back, letting go of Remus, thinking. It’d be very risky for him to try. “Do werewolves react badly to other animals?”

Remus shook his head. “Rabbits, sometimes. Small animals that a wolf may see as prey.”

Remus seemed to be closing in on himself as he spoke. Sirius could tell he wasn’t used to talking about Lycanthropy.

“A dog?”

Remus shrugged. “I don’t know.”

Sirius tapped his wand on his chin. “Would it be dangerous for the dog?”

Remus muttered something under his breath, which, unfortunately for him, Sirius heard.

“ _What_ did you just say to me,” Sirius asked, his gaze darkening.

Remus’ eyes snapped to Sirius’ before moving away just as quickly.

“I-I didn—“

“ _What did you just say to me?_ ”

Remus squeezed his eyes shut. “I didn’t me—“

Sirius leaned forward and used his wand to lift Remus’ chin up.

“If you don’t tell me what you said right now, I’ll lock you in a room with five servants tomorrow and I’ll make you stay in there with the bodies for as long as I please, one of them, a five year old child, has been being particularly difficult recently.”

There was a pause while Remus stared at Sirius in pure terror.

Remus gulped and whispered, “I asked if you’re stupid.”

“No, say it back to me.”

Remus closed his eyes and opened them, gathering himself, it seemed. “A-Are you fucking stupid?”

Sirius glared at Remus before wiping the look from his face unnervingly quickly and saying, “I’m going to try to stay with you on the full moon, so you’ll stay in my room. You shouldn’t want to destroy anything if you have a distraction, any damage can be easily repaired.”

Remus nodded jerkily and sat back, trying to back away, only to be stopped by Sirius grabbing his arm.

They spent the rest of the ride in silence, Remus staring at a spot on the seat, lost in thought, and Sirius staring out the window. Finally, the driver called behind him, “We’re here, sir.”

Sirius grabbed Remus’ arm, jerking him out of a daze, and dragged him into an alley. Remus looked around, seeing that they were in London.

“We’re apparating from here. You’ll follow me to my room and you will keep your head _down_. Regulus has a servant with the same sort of hair as you. I think it’s more of a pure red, but it’ll do. Then, we’ll be going to my office.”

Remus nodded and Sirius grabbed his arm. He twisted, pulling them both into a tight metal tube. Remus seemed to start to pass out before they popped out in front of a magnificent gate, taller than both of them combined.

Sirius walked to the entrance and bent down, leveling himself with a fake garden gnome. The gnome met eyes with Sirius and turned to squeeze through the gate, waving its hand and making the gate disappear. He gestured behind him for Remus to follow, who quickly followed, keeping close to Sirius and his head down.

They were walking up a long and twisting path.

“The gnome identifies us by our retinas. Every person has a different pattern in their retina, so it’s recognizes my own, Regulus’, and our mother’s. Polyjuice doesn’t touch your retina, no one really knows why. If you were to try to do the same, the gnome would start shrieking and gouge your eyes out. I tweaked the spell a bit last year so that it would be able to keep whoever tried alive. We have a total of three blind servants, now. Two of them,” Sirius stopped to smirk, “were just going out to get the groceries.”

Remus nodded, getting the warning. The house came into view. Remus kept his head down, Sirius noticed he wasn’t looking. They came up to the front door and Sirius pushed it open.

They walked in and Remus suddenly got a lot closer to Sirius, not daring to touch him, but not wanting to lose him. Sirius noticed and grabbed his hand, placing it on his jacket.

“Better?”

Remus nodded, letting Sirius lead him up the stairs and down a hallway. They turned once, went down a new hallway, and turned the other way, going down that hallway. They stopped in front of a door. Sirius opened it and held it open for Remus, who darted inside.

The room had a dark green carpet, with one wide bookshelf on each wall, except for behind the desk, which had two bookshelves behind it and on either side of it. The desk was dark mahogany, matching the bookshelves, which was in front of two floor to ceiling windows overlooking the grounds, which were between the bookshelves. There were two wooden chairs in front of the desk and one plush one behind it.

Sirius closed the door behind them, making Remus jump at the click of it locking.

“I _was_ just going to have you demonstrate your powers to me and have you go to my room. However, you cursed at me and then insulted me. You understand.”

Remus only turned around, eerily calm. Sirius glared at him, insulted that he wasn’t afraid, and bit his tongue. He had two options. One, keep on using the Cruciatus Curse on him, get him to beg and make him keep begging until Sirius was done. 

The second was to take him into the playroom. He liked that idea, taking Remus into the playroom and being able to get his hands dirty. They’d come back later, when they were done, and Remus would show Sirius what he could do.

Yes, Sirius liked the latter option. He walked over to Remus and grabbed his arm, walking him to a door behind one of the bookshelves, pulling it towards him to reveal the door. He opened it and shoved Remus in first, walking in behind him and locking the door behind him.

Remus was staring, horrified, at the room beyond. Sirius turned around, a little surprised at how dirty he’d let it get. Remus turned back around to Sirius, eyes wide in horror, and started to step forward, it seemed, to get past him and back into the other room. He stopped himself mid-step, though.

“Probably needs to be cleaned, but that can be done later. Stop looking at me like that and get on the table.”

The room had manacles hanging from the ceiling, several walls of _instruments_ for Sirius to use, one steel table with leather straps on all four corners, more tables of more instruments, a chair with more leather straps, and a door, which seemed to lead to another room.

Every item in the room was covered in blood. It smelled of old urine, blood, and sweat. Remus had switched back to his resigned attitude and slowly got onto the table and stayed sitting up, not willing to trap himself. 

Sirius walked in front of him and pushed him down with a hand to his chest. “Hands.”

Remus put his hands where they were supposed to, also spreading his legs. Sirius strapped each limb down and stood back.

“You realize why I’m doing this?”

“Disrespect,” Remus said in a monotone voice.

“Very good. Personally, I believe the punishment should fit the crime. You want to curse at me and insult me? I’ll cut your vocal chords out.”

A flash of surprise and fear on Remus’ face, but he quickly hid it. Sirius continued. “Or, at least, I would do that if you were a normal servant. But, one, you’re going to need your voice, two, you’re a werewolf. I’m thinking silver.”

Sirius watched Remus bite his lip, obviously not wanting to say what just came to mind.

Sirius smirked and got out a silver knife, a jar of silver shards, and a small thing of molten silver. “You're lucky. I would love to cut your vocal chords out.”

Sirius unbuttoned Remus’ shirt. He then picked up the long and very obviously silver knife and placed it over his heart. “I know you at least have an understanding of nonverbal magic, so, maybe another time.”

And with that, Sirius cut into Remus, making a long and deep cut on his chest over his heart. He put his hand over Remus’ mouth, who was starting to scream, and dragged his knife down to his stomach.

“Should we take a look? I, personally, have always wondered what a werewolf’s insides would look like. I mean, your body is constantly changing. So I do wonder if maybe a few things aren’t where they’re supposed to be.”

Remus shook his head frantically. Sirius smirked.

“Really? You’re not the least bit curious?”

Remus shook his head again, already sobbing against Sirius’ hand.

Sirius shrugged and started to peel the cut open, simply letting Remus scream. He knew he’d have to get through a few layers of muscles. He was fully prepared to do so, too, just to see. He lined his knife up with the cut and started to cut into Remus again. He’d gotten through the second layer, now.

He noticed that Remus seemed to be on the verge of passing out. He stopped completely and went to a cabinet, looking through the vials of potions. He found the one he was looking for and simply poured it into Remus’ mouth, knowing that his reflex would be to swallow. Remus woke up a millisecond later, still moaning in pain.

Sirius felt himself get hard again and smirked as he cut through the last layer. He loved sound of the tear of the muscle coming apart, it was so underrated. Sirius looked down at Remus’ bloody torso, at where his insides seemed to be visible.

“Hm, looks like I was right. They seem to be a little disturbed.”

Sirius straightened up and got the small glass jar with the silver shards in it. He uncapped it, wondering why he had this in the first place, and poured a light layer over the exposed innards.

Remus seemed to levitate off of the able as he screamed. Sirius put his hand over his mouth and asked, “Do you think not being able to scream makes pain worse?”

Remus, of course, didn’t answer, his screams weren’t fading, neither was the pain, Sirius could tell.

Sirius watched him cry and try to squirm away from the pain. It was the day before the full moon. Sirius sighed and took pity on him.

He waved his wand and the straps were undone, making Remus go limp and get up after a few seconds. Sirius offered his hand, knowing Remus would ignore it. He did, but, it _was_ the day before a full moon and Sirius had just cut into his insides. In fact, they were kind of falling out. Remus swayed and ended up falling backwards.

Sirius grabbed Remus’ arm and hauled him up, from the table, knowing he’d try to walk on his own again. He held to the parts of the cut where his organs seemed to be falling out and poured another potion into Remus’ mouth. It was a blood replenishing potion, meaning that Remus wouldn’t pass out or die. 

Sirius decided that Remus wouldn’t be able to perform to his best ability, not after what he had just been through, and decided to just take him to his room.

Remus was barely conscious, Sirius could tell, kept on the edge by the potion because he was still bleeding out. He took the door opposite of the one they came and they appeared in Sirius’ closet. Sirius dragged him through and into Sirius’ room, where Sirius dropped him onto the bed.

Here, Sirius started working on making sure he didn’t bleed out when the potion wore off. Remus was already looking a bit too pale, and while Sirius was sure he wouldn’t die, it wouldn’t be ideal for it to get infected.

Sirius loved healing wounds the muggle way anyway. He didn’t think he’d used his wand on a wound since he was fifteen.

Remus drifted in and out of consciousness as Sirius worked. All he was really doing was sewing the cut back together and putting something over it to keep it closed, so it didn’t take long before he was done. The muscle would heal by itself as long as the cut wasn’t opened.

Sirius shook Remus awake and offered him another blood-replenishing potion silently. Remus accepted it, Sirius watching him carefully as he downed the offered little glass.

“Go to sleep. Its around eight anyway, you’ll likely sleep through the night. I’ll be back later to make sure you’re sleeping. If you’re not, you _will_ be back on that table.”

Remus nodded and laid back, Sirius watching him closely. Sirius smirked in amusement when he pulled a pillow out from under his head, his back to Sirius, and hugged it, now laying on nothing. He made a mental note to get him either an extra pillow or a stuffed animal and left the room, leaving Remus to cry himself to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Book excerpt from THE SCARLET LETTER; NOT ME!!!! IVE BEEN READING THE BOOK, I LOVE IT SO MUCH SO FAR, SOOO I DECIDED TO INCLUDE IT
> 
> wait... do I have to disclaim the characters and the story for Harry Potter..?
> 
> IMMA GET SUED
> 
> Skip over the parts in between the ****s if you don’t want to read any r@pe/n0nc0n

Sirius climbed into his bed early that morning, where Remus was already asleep. He looked over at the lump in his blankets where he knew Remus was before climbing under the blankets.

Remus seemed to jump, making Sirius turn to look at him. He watched the tense moment of Remus realizing where he was pass and leaned over. “Morning.”

Remus pulled the blankets down and looked at Sirius, who smiled cruelly at him. “M’rning?”

Sirius checked a clock, saw the time, and turned back to Remus. “It’s four, close enough.”

Remus groaned. He tried to turn back around, with a sharp intake of breath, but Sirius reached over and stopped him. He loved this. “Ah, ah, ah! You’ve woken up for the day.”

Remus squeezed his eyes shut, Sirius noticed he seemed to be trying to gather himself. “Have you woken up for the day?”

Sirius smirked. He wished he bought Remus earlier. “No. I’m just laying down to go to sleep. You, however, are going to stay awake. Bookshelves are over there. Read from that one,” Sirius pointed, “You need tea?”

Remus shook his head. Sirius watched him look as if he were going to say something and then get up, hissing and trying to discreetly cross his arm over his stomach. “Anything I’m not allowed to read?”

Sirius thought it over, looking over at the shelf. His brow furrowed, he forgot which one that was. “That’s the fiction shelf? Includes some muggle books?”

Remus looked at the shelf, he squinted and said, “I think so. You have ‘Of Mice and Men’ here.”

Sirius nodded. “Good book. Stick to that shelf, wait for me to clean out my other shelves.”

Remus nodded. He wasn’t allowed to question his owner, he knew this. He wouldn’t ask. Just like he wouldn’t ask for coffee instead of tea.

Sirius watched Remus space out against the shelf, wondering what he was thinking. “Something on your mind?”

Remus jumped, then grunted in pain, Sirius was amused to see. “No. Of course not.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow as Remus looked at the bookshelf again. “Do I need to curse you? You’re not allowed to lie.”

Remus sighed and turned around. “It’s not something I need to tell you.”

Sirius sighed, annoyed. “Five seconds.”

Remus leaned against the bookshelf. His breathing was heavy, he was definitely in pain, Sirius noticed. Sirius raised an eyebrow, insulted at his lack of an answer. “Five.”

Remus’ eyes found Sirius’, who smirked and continued, “Four.”

Sirius picked up his wand, if it turned out Remus wouldn’t answer, he’d probably only use one of his homemade spells, instead of _Crucio_.

“Three.”

Sirius started to point his wand at different parts of Remus’ body, trying to decide where to hit. “Two. Are you really going to make me do this?”

Remus closed his eyes. “Was going to ask if you had coffee. Instead of tea.”

Sirius scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Way to build up an entire anticlimax.”

Remus seemed to be shaking, Sirius noticed. He looked at his face, Remus was staring at his feet. Sirius ended up taking his shoes off for him, not wanting his shoes in his bed, the night before. He had noticed that Remus needed a shower, too.

“Okay. I’m going to sleep, you’ll get your coffee later. You’re going to get back where you were. Where’s my pillow?”

Sirius looked around, then found it on the ground. Okay. “Pick out your book. Get my pillow off the ground, put it in your lap.”

Remus looked at the shelf and picked out three books, all muggle, Sirius noticed. Sirius looked at the covers. “Read ‘The Scarlet Letter’ to me.”

Remus took a shaking breath, hugging the books to his chest. He took the pillow off of the ground and put it in his lap as he sat down next to where Sirius was laying. Sirius laid his head on the pillow and smirked up at Remus. 

“Read.”

Remus looked down at Sirius, he was terrified, Sirius noticed. His voice shook as he started, “A throng of bearded men, in sad-coloured garments and grey steeple-crowned hats, inter-mixed with women, some wearing hoods, and others bareheaded, was assembled in front of a wooden edifice, the door of which was heavily timbered with oak, and studded with iron spikes,” he read.

Sirius settled down, laying in his lap, and let his voice lull him to sleep. He felt a hand run through his hair and reminded himself to reprimand Remus for it later. It was nice, though.

Maybe not.

-.-

Sirius jumped as Remus jumped and the alarm went off. Sirius groaned and turned over. He picked his wand up and shot a spell at the clock. Remus jumped as he did it, Sirius heard his small noise, still pained.

Sirius turned back to Remus, who seemed to be falling asleep. Sirius narrowed his eyes. “You stayed awake like I told you to, right?”

Remus looked away. Sirius got on his knees and crawled forward. “You didn’t follow orders?”

Remus moved back a little as Sirius got closer. “I-I tried, I swear!”

“Trying isn’t good enough. You do what I tell you, you don’t _try_.”

Sirius was enjoying this, a little too much, he knew. He loved watching Remus’ fear, would love to see more of it. It was even better with Remus because he knew that Remus tried really hard to hide his what he was thinking and feeling. He succeeded, usually, too, Sirius could tell.

“I-I’m sorry! I only fell asleep... wh-what time is it?”

Sirius raised an eyebrow at Remus. “Five.”

Remus closed his eyes, sighing in relief. Sirius crossed his arms and inclined his head. “Less than five minutes.”

Sirius was unimpressed, he grabbed his wand and pointed it at Remus, who flinched then cried out. “How long would you have been asleep if I didn’t have to wake up at five?”

Remus shrugged, irritating Sirius more. “You’re about this,” Sirius held up his thumb and index finger, Remus couldn’t even tell they weren’t touching, “far from getting cursed, then me locking someone in here with you and me tonight.”

Remus tried to back away, but he almost fell from the bed. He shouted and grabbed his stomach. Sirius caught him, dragged him back up onto the bed, and put him back where he was. “Okay. Fine.”

Remus stared, horrified, at Sirius, when he got up and pointed his wand at Remus. “Eh. Later. Bathroom, now.”

Remus got up as quickly as he could manage, and walked to the bathroom. Sirius followed, admiring his arse in his too small trousers.

“Strip.”

Remus turned around and looked at Sirius. Sirius raised an eyebrow at him and pointed his wand at him.

Remus started unbuttoning his shirt. Sirius crossed over to the toilet and watched, effectively making Remus more uncomfortable.

He noticed that Remus stopped. “Keep going,” his voice echoed off of the walls.

Remus sighed and dropped his head forward. He let his shirt drop, so Sirius pointed his wand at it and muttered, “ _Incendio._ ”

Remus jumped as the heat touched the backs of his calves. Sirius leaned back, smirking, and pointed his wand at Remus’ trousers. “Better hurry with those. Five, four,” Remus started to frantically unbutton his trousers, struggling to get them unbuttoned, “Three, two, _Incendio_.”

Remus yelped as they caught fire and unbuttoned them, pulling them off as quickly as possible. He cried out in pain again, grabbing the cut on his stomach, which stopped him for a few precious seconds. They ended up burning all down his legs, especially as he pulled them down, he felt the skin start to peel. He took off his pants, which had also caught fire.

Sirius stood up and started to draw a bath before turning back to Remus. Remus’ eyes were on the bathtub that was far to big, basically a swimming pool, and the steam coming from it. Sirius circled around behind him, looking down at his arse. He let his hand slide down Remus’ back and rest above it. Remus was shaking either from pain or fear, so Sirius let his finger graze a burn.

“Did I burn you,” Sirius asked, his voice lightly mocking.

Remus nodded, knowing he’d be reprimanded for lying if he did. Sirius’ hand disappeared for a second. It came back down a second later with a sharp crack that made Remus cry out and try to run across the room.

Sirius sighed and pulled Remus back, into his front. “Don’t run. Now, you’re filthy, I’m probably going to have to check you for infection. Am I surprised? No. I’m going to get in with you, I’m going to wash you. How often did they let you bathe?”

Remus’ ears turned red, obviously embarrassed. “Not much.”

“How much, though?”

Remus seemed to hesitate before answering in a small voice, “Less than once a week, more than biweekly.”

Sirius smirked. “Got in a bit of trouble, did you?”

Remus seemed to hunch over a little as he answered, “Yes.”

Sirius let go of Remus and let him dart forward, away from him. Sirius started stripping, pulling his hair, which was up, down. “Wait for me on the toilet.”

Remus sat on the toilet, wincing. Sirius watched him, very pleased with himself. He got in the bath, then quirked his finger at Remus. Remus slowly walked forward, not wanting to get in.

He got in and jumped right out when the water touched his burns. Sirius sighed and got up, making Remus back away. He ran the other way, prompting Sirius to step out and chase him. Remus tried to open the door, which was locked. Sirius had already gotten to him and before Remus could say a word, he dragged Remus to him by the arm.

“Get in.”

Remus tried to squirm away, making Sirius grab his other arm and start to drag him to the tub. He stepped into the bath, he dragged Remus in, who was now only grabbing his stomach and crying. Sirius noticed it had started bleeding again. Remus twisted, only succeeding in losing his footing, and cried out as he was submerged in the far too hot water, which was turning pink.

He tried to get out, only to be held down by Sirius. Sirius got splashed as Remus flailed, which simply got on his nerves. He pushed Remus’ head under the water, that made his hand come up to scratch at Sirius’ wrists. Sirius ignored it, holding Remus under the water.

He’d let go when Remus went limp, either because he’d given up or because he’d passed out.

Remus twisted as Sirius pushed him down further. Sirius looked down at him, there were no bubbles in the bath, besides the air bubbles Remus was emitting, so Remus was looking at him, too. He raised an eyebrow at him and pushed him lower.

Finally, Remus figured it out. He stopped, though his hands didn’t go down. Sirius smirked at him, seeing his mouth open and a horrified look cross his face. He’d breathed in the water. Sirius let him up before he could move again, feeling merciful. 

Sirius watched, almost disinterested, as Remus coughed over the side of the tub. Finally, Sirius pulled him back. “Stop fighting, I’ll make you scared of _everything_ because I will use it _all_ against you.”

Remus nodded, panting and shaking. The burns on his legs were still hurting badly, so was his stomach, and he knew the water was making him bleed out faster. He needed to get out. Sirius let go of him, all he did was lay against Sirius’ chest, shaking. Sirius poured some water over his head, running his hand through it and making sure it was soaked through.

Remus jumped and closed his eyes. Sirius got some shampoo and lathered Remus’ hair.

He loved this, he loved Remus shaking from pain Sirius caused and cuddling up to his chest at the same time. He loved that Remus couldn’t find any other comfort that he knew he needed, so he had to turn to Sirius.

Sirius rinsed Remus’ hair and started putting the conditioner in. He liked Remus’ hair, he’d definitely enjoy taking care of it.

Sirius smirked. This part was going to hurt. “Stand.”

Remus stood up, grunting again, so Sirius stood too, making sure he was supporting him. “Don’t move an inch.”

Remus nodded, so Sirius soaped up the sponge. He started with Remus’ chest and moved down. He made sure he got every crevice, every minuscule speck of dirt, to the point where Remus looked like he’d been washed with a metal sponge. Sirius took note of each scar, each mark on his body. He was covered in a light sprinkling of freckles, some of his scars connected them. There was an odd array of scars on Remus’ back, they looked a little too organized. Sirius got to the backs of his legs.

“If you don’t move, I’ll heal them.”

Remus nodded and squeezed his eyes shut. Sirius went to the burns, also noticing that the fire got through a couple layers of skin. He scrubbed over them, making Remus cry out, and held his legs in a way that kept him upright.

To be fair, Sirius could only imagine the kind of pain that was shooting through Remus’ legs right now. They were shaking, about to give out.

Remus was definitely whimpering, but wasn’t moving more than trembling. Sirius was almost done, he went to Remus’ arse, making sure it was definitely clean and then turned him around.

He looked up at Remus from his knees and cleaned his cock, rubbing it and making him seem to jolt a little bit. Once Sirius was positive Remus was uncomfortable and a little hard, he dragged him back down, feeling nice enough to do it in a way that didn’t disturb the silver in his stomach.

“Nervous?”

Remus nodded, watching Sirius stand up and pick the dead skin from the sponge. This wouldn’t do. Sirius leaned down and jerked his chin up. “When I speak to you, I expect a verbal answer.”

Remus tried to nod, caught himself, and said, “Okay, I understand.”

Sirius let go of his chin, smirking. “Good. Tell me a story.”

Remus gave Sirius a strange look. “What?”

Sirius rolled his eyes, starting to wash his hair and sat back down, having gotten the shampoo and conditioner. “Tell me a story. About yourself. I can’t know about it. It has to tell me something about you. And be interesting.”

Remus closed his eyes, seeming to struggle with himself, and finally, after a few minutes, started, “Once, I was bought by a woman. Her slaves told me stories about you and your family, so I know she was not so distantly related. You were at least allowed to do what you wanted with them. And, I guess, she looked a lot like you do, now that I think of it.”

Sirius nodded, standing to wash himself, that sounded a lot like Bellatrix. He’d bet money he’d heard this story from her.

“Rather than taking me back right away because I was getting from place to place too fast, she tried to get to the bottom of it. She didn’t think to ask if I knew how to cast spells, if she did, I would have had to answer. Then, she would have been able to ask what spells, leading to me telling her apparition. She had this spell on us that made it so we couldn’t lie.”

Sirius sat back down, rinsing himself and clean, but intrigued. He waved his hand, cleaning the water and closing the wound on Remus’ stomach. He actually hadn’t heard this story from Bella, probably because she was too proud to tell anyone.

“She asked me again and again, but I was able to get around it by telling her, the normal way. It wasn’t a lie, wizards and witches usually apparate. So, she used the Cruciatus Curse on me, thinking that maybe I had found away around the spell. I don’t know how long it went, hours, at least, days, at most. All I remember was that towards the end, she still hadn’t gotten any other answer from me. I still don’t know how I kept my mind.”

Sirius cocked his head, not knowing where this was going. He could tell it was going somewhere good, though.

“I think I did lose my mind for a little bit, I know that everything went black for a while and, next thing I knew, I was in my quarters. She’d left a note threatening a worse punishment if I didn’t tell her when she visited me next. I, um, I never told her I was a werewolf. I didn’t get the chance. When she visited me next, I’d turned. She barely got away alive, I’d scratched her arm up. Obviously, slaves are illegal, so she couldn’t take me to the ministry, I’m not registered as human or werewolf anywhere.”

Sirius held up his hand, halting the story. “We don’t own slaves. You’re a servant.”

Remus crossed his arms and leaned back, saying before he thought not to, “So you’ll be paying me and I’ll be allowed to go home and have vacation days, assuming I have a home. And we have the option to leave? If so, I quit.”

Sirius felt a pit of anger in his stomach, even though he knew it was true. He glared at Remus darkly, who looked like he was regretting all of his life choices. His eyes were screwed shut, his brows furrowed. His mouth was in a thin like and he looked like he wanted to run.

“I’ll cut those burns off your body next time you speak to me like that. However, point taken and ignored. Continue.”

Remus sighed and opened his eyes, which were closed as if he was expecting Sirius to curse him. “She almost killed me, her husband was barely able to stop her. The only reason she didn’t was because she didn’t want to go through the hassle of covering it up. She brought me back, told Folgens what happened. Th-that part isn’t very important,” Sirius noticed that Remus’ index finger twitched, though he was looking at the bathwater, “That’s why I didn’t tell you I was a werewolf at first. I was hoping for the same result, except maybe I’d kill you instead.”

Sirius cocked his head to the side again. “Seven things. One, Bella,” Remus jumped at the name, “told us her arm was mauled by a hippogriff. She wouldn’t explain why she didn’t get rid of the scars, though, probably because she didn’t want to admit she couldn’t tell you are a werewolf. She probably didn’t kill you because she was too proud to have us get rid of your body.”

Remus seemed to shrink into the tub. Sirius knew what he was thinking and wasn’t ready to give him peace of mind, yet. “Two, if you want to kill someone, I already have it covered.”

Remus shook his head, which Sirius promptly ignored and said, “Three, what did Folgens do to you? I’m curious, now.”

Remus was shaking, Sirius loved how easily he could get him in this state. It didn’t matter how much he said or didn’t say, what he thought about or didn’t, the fact of the matter was that he was extremely fragile. “Not important.”

“You’re lying.”

Remus sighed and withdrew into himself even more. “He-he did what anyone would do. That’s all.”

Sirius sat back and crossed his ankle over his knee. “I want to know exactly what it was.”

Remus looked up and met Sirius’ eyes, he was terrified. He looked away as soon as Sirius caught his eyes. Sirius was a little confused, Folgens always said that he never punished the servants being sold. Something about them being in top condition. Remus was definitely not in top condition.

“I can get back at him,” Sirius offered.

Remus looked up again. “What? Why?”

Sirius shrugged, pulling Remus towards him. “He said he never punishes the servants he sells,” Remus gave a derisive laugh, “he wants you in top condition. You’re obviously not in top condition. Why not, it gives me a reason to curse him.”

Remus sighed closing his eyes. Sirius stared at him until he finally spoke. “You’ve probably already gathered that he does, indeed, punish the slaves. Not just me, though. It’s not just the ones he could get away with because no one wants to buy us. It’s everyone.”

Sirius nodded. Then, he held up his finger. “I’m going to get you Veritaserum. You’re going to say it under that, so he can’t lie to me.”

Remus nodded, he clearly didn’t want Sirius to come back angry and thinking he’d lied.

“Great. Four, think of yourself as a servant, not a slave. I hate that word, do not say it around me.”

Remus looked unbelieving. Sirius knew he was probably questioning his sanity. However, he answered, “Okay.”

What other choice did he have, Sirius thought smugly.

“Five, I think you just fainted. You blacked out, correct?”

Remus took a shaky breath. “Not exactly. I can only describe it that way, but it was more like a... daze? I was aware of everything, but I was trapped in my own mind, almost.”

Sirius frowned. “Hm. I want to look into that. I’ll decide how in a few days. Six, Bella will be here today,” Remus tensed up, “in my room. If you’re cooperative today, I’ll hide you.”

Remus seemed to sag in relief, which let Sirius know he’d behave. “Lastly, you _actually_ wanted to kill me? You were legitimately hoping I wouldn’t find out?”

Remus looked away. Sirius could tell he’d assumed that he’d known. “Lucky me, huh? Okay, out. Into my office, I’ll get you clothes.”

Remus stood up carefully, Sirius following. Sirius grabbed a fluffy black towel from the two on the towel rack and wrapped it around Remus, then took the green one for himself. “Room.”

Remus exited the bathroom, into Sirius’ bedroom. Sirius watched him stop dead in the doorway and then try to run back in, to be stopped by Sirius.

Sirius looked up at the door. Ah. “Hi, Reg.”

Regulus was looking at Remus with narrowed eyes, who was facing Sirius.

“Who’s that?”

Sirius looked down at Remus, who didn’t move. He adjusted the towel around his waist. “One of the servants.”

Regulus cocked his head to the side, a lot like Sirius. “Our only red headed servant has been in the sitting room for the past hour.”

Sirius scoffed. “And what are you, Auror Jones?”

“Don’t deflect. Who is that?”

Sirius looked down at Remus, deciding he didn’t have to be present for this conversation. “Back in the bathroom.”

Remus made to step around Sirius before Regulus ordered, “No, stay here. If you’ve been here all along, you have to listen to me, too.”

Sirius watched Remus stop dead at the word ‘stay’. “I’ll take you to the playroom. Get in the bathroom.”

Remus practically ran into the bathroom at that, crying out in pain yet again.

Regulus looked up at Sirius. “You seem to already have taken him to that room.”

Sirius shrugged. “Keeps them in line, it doesn’t hurt to do it.”

Regulus gave Sirius a dubious look, before running a hand through his hair and looking away from his naked brother. “No, it doesn’t hurt you, it hurts them a lot, kills them sometimes.”

Sirius shrugged again, as if the solution to that were obvious, “Then they don’t get in trouble.”

Regulus crossed over to Sirius’ bed and sat on it. He sat back and crossed his legs. “Who is that?”

“I told you, it’s a servant.”

Regulus shot down a fly that had gotten into the room with his wand. He put it away, not looking at Sirius. “Where’d he come from?”

Sirius crossed to his dresser and got out a shirt. “I went to Folgens yesterday.”

“You’re not supposed to—“

“And I got myself a little test subject. I paid for him with my own money, he’s mine. Not the family’s, mine.”

That caught Regulus’ full attention. He looked to Sirius, who was buttoning his trousers. “You are _not_ fit to own any servants, not on your own!”

Sirius heard Remus jump in the bathroom and his sharp intake of breath. “Come out, I still need to dress you!”

Remus poked his head out, to be beckoned forward by Sirius. He walked over to him and stood in front of him.

“ _Vous êtes mentalement inconsidéré, vous ne pouvez rien posséder qui peut respirer._ ”

Sirius shrugged, getting one of his shirts out. “ _Il doit se comporter_.”

Regulus rolled his eyes and seemed to have a mini aneurysm. “ _Ramène-le!_ ”

Sirius smirked, getting out a nice green shirt and holding it up to Remus. He shook his head and turned back to his dresser. “ _Je ne peux pas. J'ai sa baguette, je ne peux pas le ramener._ ”

Regulus simply got up and left. Sirius was picking up another shirt, comparing the two. He turned back around, seeing Regulus had left. “Finally. Now, come here.”

Remus stepped forward again, so he was right in front of Sirius. “We are going to my office right now. Bella should be here at seven, however, it’s Bella, so we’ll take seven for yesterday. Arms out.”

Remus put his arms out. Sirius put the black shirt on him and, deciding he liked it, started buttoning it. “I-isn’t there a uniform?”

Sirius looked up at Remus. “I don’t want you in that uniform. I want you in my clothes, so no one thinks you’re everyone’s. I bought you. I own you.”

Remus bit back his reply, averting his eyes. Sirius knew what he was thinking. He didn’t want Sirius to own him. Sirius could tell he wanted to at least be able to hide behind Regulus. It was what Sirius had been able to prevent.

“Wanted to run to Regulus when you make me angry, did you?”

Remus jumped, Sirius’ words yanking him from his thoughts.

“No. I don’t plan on making you angry.”

Sirius snorted. “In the last... let’s see, I bought you around six, six thirty, it’s five thirty-ish now. Less than twelve hours, you’ve managed to piss me off more than most of the other servants have in all their time here. You’re going to make me very angry, you’re going to run to Reg at least once, he’s going to hide you.”

Remus averted his gaze. Sirius held out some trousers for him to step into.

“No pants?”

Sirius shook his head. “No. I’m not giving you permission to do anything I said you would, I hope you realize? You can’t hide forever, you can’t escape, and I get angrier as time passes.”

Remus nodded, closing his eyes. “I realize. I don’t plan on it, though.”

Sirius smirked, knowing that promise would likely be broken within the hour. “Good. You should have no problem, then. You may even find living here, dare I say, pleasant.”

Remus seemed to bite down on his tongue, not even looking at Sirius. He wanted to say something, Sirius could tell.

“Office, now.”

Remus followed Sirius from the room, down the hall. Sirius opened the door for him and gestured to the chairs in front of his desk. Remus sat in one, Sirius closed and locked the door, muttering, “ _Silencio_.”

Sirius crossed the room, noticing how tense Remus was. He sat on the other side of the desk and waved his wand, summoning a cup of coffee and cream and sugar for Remus. He waved his hand at the set, letting Remus know he could make his cup. Sirius watched Remus make himself a cup and start to drink it.

Sirius let him finish the coffee, staring at him drink it rather than making conversation.

“Better?”

Remus nodded. “Very much, thanks.”

He pointed his wand at him and threw him across the room, into the opposite wall. Remus’ nose and stomach started bleeding again, Sirius walked over and stood over him, checking for bleeding ears.

“Fair enough? I told you I’d curse you this morning.”

Remus nodded shakily, pinching his nose. His eyes were closed. Sirius nudged him with his foot, saying, “Look at me.”

Remus opened his eyes, Sirius checked them to make sure no blood vessels popped. “You don’t seem to have a concussion, so get up. I’ll tend to your stomach later.”

Remus nodded, sitting up and getting shakily to his feet. Sirius heard his pained gasp and made a mental note to vanish the silver later. Sirius seated himself again, looking at Remus across his desk.

“How badly do you usually hurt yourself during the full moon?”

Remus tilted his head to the side, thinking. “Once I woke up with my intestines hanging out of my stomach.”

Sirius blinked slowly. “Both of them?”

Remus nodded. He leaned back and picked at a nail. “They were still attached to... wherever they’re supposed to be. I was lucky to survive that one, now that I think about it.”

Sirius gave Remus a sharp look. “No one helped you?”

Remus covered his mouth with his hand, not quite hiding his amused smile. “No. No, they didn’t.”

Sirius glared at Remus, which made the smile slide off of his face. “You’re amused by that?”

Remus tilted his head from side to side. “Yes. You honestly think I, a werewolf, sla—servant, to Solonto Folgens since I was twelve, got help with my lycanthropy?”

Sirius leaned back, putting his feet on the desk. “Fair,” he conceded. 

Remus sighed in relief, Sirius could see him entering a train of thought that would take him from reality yet again. “Next,” Remus jumped a little, “I’ll be caring for you after the full moons, werewolves don’t pose any threat to anything but humans and small animals that normal wolves hunt, at least that’s what I read last night, so a dog with you should help a lot. There will be a servant in there, tonight. A woman who... I need to get rid of because she’s simply a bitch. We’ll be seeing if I can stop you if I need to tonight.”

Remus had been getting paler and paler as Sirius spoke. He took a deep breath and tried to ask, “Please, I—”

“Don’t start. I’ll put the little boy in there tonight, if you even try to ask me to reconsider. It’s an experiment.”

Remus shakily sighed and closed his mouth, not even wanting to think about Sirius doing that.

“Good boy.”

Remus seemed to die a little inside at that, even as his cheeks went a little red.

He liked being complimented, Sirius took note of that. Especially, it seemed, if the one giving the compliment said it in a condescending and dominant way.

He hated it, too.

“Stand.”

Remus got up. Sirius got up, too, drawing his wand. He pointed it at Remus’ stomach and mended the cut there, still not vanishing the silver. “You’re going to duel me. Use every spell you know,” Remus’ eyes went wide and horrified, “Don’t give me that look, I won’t aim to kill you. You’re going to start wandlessly, you said you can to that. Defend yourself, you won’t be punished if you hurt me.”

Sirius drew his wand, Remus put his hands up. Sirius shot a spell at Remus, who deflected it almost lazily. 

Sirius shot another spell, Remus deflected it again and shot a rather large flame at Sirius. Sirius dodged it and sent another spell at Remus. Remus put up a shield spell and held it. Sirius looked at it, intrigued.

He shot a spell at it. It didn’t break. Sirius approached Remus, looking at the shield. “Keep that up. I’m going to test it.”

Remus nodded and Sirius watched the shield get stronger. “Don’t overwork yourself, if you need to, put it down. Don’t push yourself over the edge.”

Remus nodded again, biting his lip. Sirius shot a spell at it, it didn’t even waver. He shot another, it actually bounced off of the shield. “Is this a homemade spell? It’s not the normal shield spell.”

Remus nodded. “The regular shield spell takes too much concentration and effort because it’s not made to be cast nonverbally. This one is made to be nonverbal.”

Sirius nodded. He cast another spell, it didn’t fade. “When did you invent it?”

“Hogwarts. I went for my first year.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow at Remus. “You didn’t tell me that.”

“That counts as education?”

Sirius shot another spell at the shield. “Yes. Did you already know what you learned that year?”

Remus nodded, thinking back. “Yes.”

Sirius tried a charm on the shield. It didn’t work, he was impressed. “You did? All of it?”

“Um, yes. McGonagall said my level was around fifth year, it not N.E.W.T level.”

Sirius thought back to his first year, wondering if he remembered Remus. “House?”

“Gryffindor.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow at Remus. “ _Really?_ ”

Remus nodded. “The hat almost put me in Ravenclaw, but I ended up in Gryffindor.”

Sirius thought back. “You were quiet? Read a lot? Stuttered and answered almost all the questions asked? There may have been rumors surrounding how you got in Gryffindor?”

Remus nodded slowly. Sirius tried to shoot the shield down again. “I remember you. I watched you a lot back then, figured out what you were around January from my house in Slytherin.”

Remus’ mouth twisted to the side. “Interesting.”

Sirius looked at Remus for a long second. “You’re unrecognizable. Why were you pulled out?”

Remus stared at the wall behind Sirius, his eyes glazing over a bit. He let the shield fall.

Sirius gave him a surprised look and put his wand away. Remus looked at him. “It started to get to be too much.”

Sirius looked Remus in the eyes, asking, “Did it?”

Remus nodded, not looking away. Sirius was the first to break eye contact, confirming to himself that it wasn’t too much. Remus wanted to change the subject, that didn’t mean Sirius would drop it. He went to his desk and got Remus’ wand out.

“You don’t use your wand at all?”

Remus shook his head, seeming to be fighting the impulse to run at Sirius and take his wand.

“You want it?”

Remus nodded, his eyes going to Sirius’. “Good. What’s your father’s name?”

Remus took a step back, Sirius could tell he wasn’t expecting that. “Why?”

Sirius pointed his wand at Remus and told him, “Answer the question.”

Remus’ eyes went to Sirius’ wand and back to his eyes. He looked back down at his wand and answered, “Lyall Lupin.”

Sirius nodded to himself, he recognized the name instantly, he’d look into it later. He threw Remus his wand and watched him catch it, taking it and staring at it. Sirius gave him a few seconds before hitting him with a stinging hex.

“Focus. I can always just snap your wand, you obviously don’t need it.”

Remus nodded and held his wand up. Sirius held his up and bowed, so Remus followed. They both turned and took three steps the other way before they turned back to each other.

Sirius sent Remus a spell first, who deflected it. Remus sent fire from his hand at Sirius, who dodged it and held up a finger warningly.

“Only use your wand.”

Remus muttered a curse under his breath and apologized, “I’m sorry.”

Sirius shot him a look at his cursing and shot another spell at him. Remus easily diverted it and shot another spell at Sirius, who staved off Remus’ spell just as easily.

Sirius tried again, but Remus did the same thing as before. He sent another spell to Sirius and almost got him. However, Sirius dodged it and sent another spell at Remus, who had to dodge his spell.

Sirius tried again, just as Remus did, and they met in the middle, bouncing off each other. Remus tried again, but Sirius deflected it again.

Finally, _finally_ , Sirius hit Remus. He cut his shoulder, making Remus fall back, crying out. Sirius lowered his wand, about to step forward to check the cut, but Remus sent a burning spell at him.

He hit Sirius on the stomach, almost the crotch. Sirius grunted and shouted, “Draw!”

Remus put down his wand and grabbed his shoulder, which was bleeding heavily. Sirius walked up to Remus and held his hand out to him. Remus grabbed his hand and got up.

“That’s almost not at all surprising.”

Remus let Sirius lead him back to his chair and sit him down. “What is?”

“We’re extremely evenly matched, we even used the same spells.”

Remus looked a bit surprised, asking, “How’d you know they were the same?”

Sirius picked up a quill and some parchment and started writing, saying, “Same color lights, or jets, or whatever. What is your middle name?”

“John.”

Sirius snorted. “Should ask your father why that’s your middle name and not your first,” he muttered.

Remus’ gaze snapped up. “ _What?_ ”

Sirius looked up at him, dipping his quill in his ink-pot. “You didn’t know? Your father works at the Ministry, now. He’s decently high ranking, no one knows he ever had a son.”

Remus looked liked he had just gotten hit in the gut. His hands were in fists by his side, he bit down on his lip. Sirius was writing again. “I smell drama.”

Remus stayed silent, Sirius could practically hear him considering trying to run. Sirius looked up at him. “Do you want to see him?”

Remus shook his head, almost shouting, “No!”

Sirius shrugged, saying, “He has to come over often, he’s been passing a lot of laws lately, especially about werewolves. I’m the one who gets to decide if they get passed.”

Sirius watched Remus closely, trying to get something from him. However, he seemed to shut down, his face going completely impassive. Sirius frowned, this was not what he was expecting.

“You have nothing to say about that?”

Remus slowly shook his head, staring at his knees. Sirius seemed to have hit a nerve.

“Do you think about your father a lot?”

Remus eyes snapped up. “Don’t you have work to do?”

Sirius looked up at Remus. “Only healing you and checking you for infection. Just wanted to make conversation.”

Remus seemed to be having an internal battle, his face was switching between impassive and a million different emotions on his face at once.

“Can I leave?”

Sirius smirked. “Not until I’m done. It’ll only take a few minutes, thirty at most. Here,” Sirius waved his wand and Remus felt the silver and the burns disappear.

He sighed in relief. Sirius watched him slump over in the chair. “Next, infections.”

Remus nodded. Sirius got up and waved his wand over Remus’ head. A few minutes passed where a violet light went over Remus’ body. Nothing. “Huh. Very good.”

Sirius crossed the room to a cabinet, taking the Veritaserum out. “Small sip.”

Remus let the potion touch his tongue and passed the vial back to Sirius. Sirius capped it and sat back behind his desk. He added a bit to the coffee and gestured to the it again.

Remus made himself another cup.

“Tell me about what Folgens did to you.”

Remus crossed his arms over his stomach and stared at the desk. Sirius could tell he was scared, definitely traumatized. He took a sip of his coffee, not speaking.

“I can’t return you, I won’t tell him. Not without hurting him badly, at the least. You’re safe from him here.”

Remus looked up at him, meeting his eyes for a moment and sipped some more coffee before he started. “The worst thing he’d do is whip us. It doesn’t sound too bad on the surface, especially if you’re into that sort of thing, but the whips were practically knives. I have scars on my back that he couldn’t get rid of, he’d done it so much to me. It could go on for minutes to hours. It usually lasted hours with me.”

Sirius nodded, he remembered seeing those scars on Remus’ back. He’d figured they weren’t from his transformations.

“What’s the best thing? Or, the— you know what I mean.”

Remus nodded, taking another drink of coffee, and continued. “That would be when he locked us in this room. Some of us have died in there, I almost died in there. He’d keep us in there for weeks at a time, half a loaf of bread for food. There were no windows or light, no human contact. It was made of concrete, barely cleaned, so there was a corner where we used the bathroom. No sort of furniture of any kind. The least amount of time he kept one of us in there would have been three weeks.”

Sirius glared at his desk, he was beyond furious at this new information. “Just one question,” his voice was wavering with fury.

Remus looked up at him. “Hm?”

**** “He advertises his girls as virgins,” Remus snorted at that.

“He— he, er, did-did _that_ as punishment to girls and guys equally. Very bloody sometimes. I was lucky enough for him to be scared of what would happen to him if he tried that with me.”

Sirius nodded, looking at Remus closely. “How do you know about that?”

Remus’ mouth twisted in disgust as he answered, “He’d do it in front of us.**** He’d also whip people in front of the rest of us. There were at least five ‘shows’ a night. I was usually included, thinking back, I think he may have singled me out. I was twelve when I was first whipped, at the time, I thought it was the most excruciating pain I’d ever been in, if you want a scope of how bad it was.”

Sirius was silent, letting Remus get out everything he needed to say.

“Have you ever seen anyone die?”

Remus bit his lip, the skin turning white. “A little girl,” he whispered, “you can guess how, I won’t say.”

Sirius was disgusted and furious, barely holding himself back from leaving now to kill Folgens. Remus was looking at the desk with completely blank eyes, very clearly having gone anywhere else.

“Leave.”

Remus jumped up and practically ran from the office. Sirius could only hope he remembered which room to go into.

.-.

It was four-forty five. The sun would set at around five thirty, maybe six. Sirius was looking for the servant, Sarah, he believed her name was. But first, he had to check on his room.

Remus wasn’t in sight, though undoubtedly there. Sirius waved his wand, checking the wards. They were fine. 

Now, to find Remus and make sure he was where he was supposed to be.

Sirius checked under the bed, Remus wasn’t there. He checked the closet, he wasn’t there, either.

“Remus?”

“Hm?”

Sirius turned to where Remus’ voice came from. The windowsill, behind the curtains. He rolled his eyes.

“Get away from the window, you can read tomorrow.”

Remus hopped down from the windowsill. Sirius came up to him and took the book from his hand. “Bed.”

Remus sat on the bed, watching Sirius cast spells on the bookshelves, the furniture, the walls, the floor. Sirius checked the time on the clock.

Four-fifty.

“Sit on the floor, by the wardrobe. Stay there.”

Remus did as he was told, seeming resigned. Sirius watched him, it seemed he was worn out.

“I’ll come back with her before you turn.”

Sirius left the room, going to the kitchens. He usually made her stay out of sight, meaning she was very likely there.

Sure enough, he found her in the kitchens, sitting on a stool and talking to one of the other servants. He only grabbed her by the arm and dragged her up the stairs, to his room. She actually _giggled_.

She tried to make small talk as they walked, telling Sirius she didn’t even know she was in trouble. He’d never really interacted with this servant, which made what she did make even less sense.

They got to his room. Sirius threw her onto the bed and stood in front of her. Her cheeks were red, she was looking up at him with bright eyes and her lips pushed out just the slightest bit to make them look bigger. She hadn’t seen Remus yet.

Sirius tilted his head to the side, before deciding to mess with her a little. He crawled over her on all fours and looked down at her. “Have you been saying things about me?”

She shook her head, silent. Sirius looked down at her, his thumb catching on her lip. “Really? No... say, rumours?”

Sirius glared down at her, she was starting to get scared, he could tell.

“N-no, I—”

Sirius sat up, leaning back on his haunches. “Hm, nothing about me taking you to my room? Tying you to this very bed? I believe I heard some rather accurate parts about my size.”

Sirius checked the time. It was only five. Thirty more minutes.

She was trying to backtrack now. “Th-that must have been—”

“Don’t you dare say it was my brother, how _dare_ you? He has a daughter.”

Her eyes went wider, now. Remus shifted behind Sirius. “He’s single! I-it’s perfectly—”

“He looks down on any sort of sexual interaction with servants. Especially in the way you made it out to be, he’d never do that.”

She went silent. Sirius got out his wand and threw her across the room, much like he did with Remus earlier. He turned to Remus, who backed to the wardrobe. He walked over and sat down next to him, across the room from her. “We’re going to wait here. What’s wrong, Moony, why—”

“What did you just call me?”

Sirius drew back his hand and slapped Remus, banging his head into the wall.

“Don’t you dare interrupt me. I’ll be calling you Moony, you know why.”

Remus bit his lip, holding his face. “Okay. What?”

Sirius, annoyed, hit Remus again. “Don’t use that tone with me, I can still get that little boy.”

Remus nodded. “Okay, okay. I understand, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound rude,” he gasped, having been hit hard in the same place twice.

Sirius smirked. “Good boy.”

Remus closed his eyes and rubbed his face before wincing and dropping his hand. “How are you feeling? Out of curiosity.”

Remus licked the inside of his cheek and winced again. “Like my bones are being stretched like rubber, my muscles are being pulled, and I haven’t slept in a week. Also, like every injury you’ve given me has been magnified by a million.”

Sirius watched Remus slump against the wardrobe. He almost felt bad. Almost. _Almost._ “Have you felt like this all day?”

“Yes. I’m sorry if I didn’t hide it well enough, I tried.”

Sirius nudged his foot with his own, making Remus pull himself up. “Quite the contrary. You’re very good at hiding that sort of thing, I can’t decide if I hate it or love it.”

Remus closed his eyes and kept them that way, Sarah shifted. Sirius looked at her, she gave him a terrified look back.

More time passed. Sirius changed into a dog around five-twenty, Remus’ hand immediately found his fur and pet him.

Sirius licked his hand, telling him to keep going. He turned onto his stomach.

Remus looked down at him, clearly unsure of what he should do. “Can you blink twice if you’re fine with me petting you?”

Sirius rolled his eyes as much as he could before blinking twice.

Sirius’ leg started kicking as Remus rubbed his tummy, his tongue lolled out as he smiled, open-mouthed.

Suddenly, Remus stopped. Sirius rolled over and looked over at him, curious about what would happen.

Remus was hunched over, whimpering and crying. Sirius watched as he held it in as long as possible before he screamed. His nose started to grow out into a snout, fur started to grow all over his body. His ears seemed to go into his head and pop out as a wolf’s ears on the top of his head. Sirius tilted his head to the side, Remus had fallen by now, curled up into a ball, he was crying and screaming. 

His nails grew into claws, bleeding quite a bit. His fingers withdrew into paws and grew furry, Sirius noticed that Remus’s fur was dark grey. His back hunched over, turning into one of a wolf as a tail grew from his tailbone. Sirius looked at his eyes and noticed they were still human, possibly the last to transform. 

The last of the transformation came through, so that Remus was fully wolf, now. His eyes changed to those of a wolfs in front of Sirius’ eyes, the pupils not turning fully to a wolf’s, close enough, though. They turned fully yellow, which intrigued Sirius.

He wondered what the benefit of yellow eyes was.

Sarah had started screaming when Remus had started growing fur, and now she wouldn’t stop. It was aggravating the wolf, Sirius could tell, not to mention drawing attention to her.

Sirius started barking at her, growling when she screamed louder. Sirius watched Remus eyes find her, and he bit the back of Remus’ neck.

Remus started thrashing from side to side, trying to get away from Sirius’ teeth and to Sarah.

She seemed to understand what she needed to do, because she stopped screaming. Sirius internally sighed at the stop of the onslaught against his ears.

Remus was still trying to get away, trying to get to her. Sirius didn’t actually want Remus to get to her, however. He wanted to see how long he could keep Remus at bay.

Sirius butted his head against Remus’, pushing him back. Remus growled and bit Sirius, though he didn’t break skin. Sirius barked again and bit Remus’ paw.

That’s how the rest of the night went. They kept fighting, Sirius keeping Remus away from the servant, Remus trying to get to her to maul her.

-.-

The sun rose. Sirius knew it was over when Remus started howling again and, sure enough, turned back into a man. Sirius watched everything withdraw, his limbs grow, his fur shrink, his snout recede.

Sirius watched it, his head tilted to the side. He nudged the now human Remus with his nose, who only offered a crying groan.

Sirius turned back into a man, too. He turned to Sarah, who was watching the scene with wide eyes.

“H-he, I-I, wh-wh-wh-wh—”

“Wh-wh-wh-wh-wh,” Sirius mocked, grabbing a dagger from the nightstand. She saw it and gave a small shriek, backing into the bookshelf.

Sirius smirked, walking forward and amused that she honestly thought she’d live. “You can’t have thought I’d keep you alive after that, did you? You’ve already proven you can’t even keep your mouth shut about your fantasies, let alone reality.”

Sirius was in front of her, now. She stood up. “I won’t tell! I swear, please, I didn’t see this!”

Sirius held the knife to her throat, effectively shutting her up.

“You fell asleep?”

Hope appeared behind her brown eyes, as she nodded. “Yes! Yes, I fell asleep, I didn’t see it!”

Sirius lowered the dagger a bit and took another step closer, so they were less than an inch apart. “Hm.”

He could feel her heartbeat, could hear her breathing.

He jerked her head back by her long, blonde hair and sliced open her throat, the blood getting on his hand and the entire knife.

He let go of her hair and watched her drop to the ground.

Sirius went to the bathroom, picking up the toilet paper and grabbing a wad, wiping the dagger.

Remus was naked on the floor, staring at the body and breathing heavily, almost whimpering. Sirius, in dog form, didn’t even notice that his clothes ripped.

Sirius dropped the dagger on the nightstand, shedding his bloody robes and jacket.

“You could have told me my clothes would rip,” he casually told Remus.

Sirius looked over at Remus, and saw he was still staring at the body, wide eyed.

Sirius looked over at her and then back to Remus. He crossed the room and stood over Remus, blocking the body from his view.

“She would have told. I saw it, in her head. I just protected you.”

Remus looked up at him. “No,” he whispered hoarsely, making Sirius raise an eyebrow at him, “Don’t you dare tell me that I was even part of that by association. It-It wasn’t necessary, y-you did it because you wanted to. Why would they call _me_ the monster,” Remus whispered the last part to himself. Sirius wasn’t supposed to hear it.

Sirius knelt down and ran his bloody hand through Remus’ hair, bloodying it up. “I did do it because I wanted to. I loved what I just did, quite the opposite of how you’ve reacted. I’d do it again, a million times over. They call you the monster because you’re different, you can do something that they can’t. And, maybe, you kind of lose your mind when you transform.”

Sirius helped Remus up, taking him to the bed. “I’m going to have to start carrying you,” he muttered to himself.

Remus shook his head, even as he fell into Sirius. Sirius gave him a sideways glance and picked him up bridal style. “You weigh little enough that I can. I’m going to have to.”

Sirius placed Remus on the bed and picked his head up. He put a pillow under Remus’ head, passing him another to hug later, when he went to sleep.

“You need me to take care of you. You really think I want to do this?”

Remus shook his head automatically, it seemed. Sirius could tell he had his doubts about that statement, though.

Sirius didn’t blame him. He honestly liked this part just as much as he liked making his victims need it. It all made him feel so powerful.

He got out a first aid kit, one that he’d put in his nightstand the night before. Remus tried to bat his hand away, only succeeding in being hit in the face again.

“Stop it.”

Remus was too weak to keep fighting, so he just sighed and closed his eyes. Sirius made a noise in his throat, satisfied with that.

“Good boy.”

Remus’ cheeks went light pink, but he didn’t react. Sirius could tell he was trying to sleep.

Sirius looked down his body and took in the various injuries. At one point, Sirius had made Remus scratch his own arm, and now it was bleeding profusely.

Sirius started working on Remus’ injuries, stopping the bleeding and adding pain killing creams, occasionally opening his mouth to add a potion, which Remus swallowed.

When he was done, he crawled into bed with Remus. He cuddled up next to him. Remus was hugging his pillow and on his side, breathing like he’d run a marathon.

Sirius inched closer and made Remus inch back. It didn’t matter, Remus would get used to it, eventually.

He loved his new toy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made up a Wizarding version of Sherlock Holmes. That’s fun, maybe I’ll do something with it.


	3. Chapter 3

It had been a week since Sirius purchased Remus. Things were going as smoothly as he could hope. Remus was a defiant little shit, but Sirius could usually keep him under control.

He woke up for the tenth time to Remus having a panic attack in his sleep. At first, Sirius thought this may have been because of him, but Remus tended to mumble in his sleep, and he didn’t think he thought of Sirius as “Mummy”.

Sirius looked over and tapped his shoulder, waking him up.

“Bad dream?”

Remus stared at Sirius’ chest with a completely far away look on his face. He shook his head, the light from the dying candle on the nightstand highlighting the fresh wounds on his face. Sirius would get rid of them later.

Yet another problem. Remus wouldn’t even admit he was having nightmares, and yet, he kept waking Sirius up with him. It was insulting and it wasn’t helping anything.

“I’m getting a little sick of this.”

Remus looked up at Sirius, terrified. Sirius felt satisfaction at that, especially when he took in the fresh bruises and cuts on his face. “I’ll try harder, I’m sorry. I-I don’t know what to do to try not to wake you.”

Sirius shook his head, annoyed. “ _No_. That’s not the problem. You know it’s not, stop playing dumb. I’m going to ask again, was it a bad dream?”

Remus shook his head. Sirius actually face-palmed. “Yes, it was. You know it was, I know it was.”

Remus looked up at Sirius. There was a long pause, Remus was obviously reluctant to admit it. Finally, defeated, he admitted, “It was a bad dream.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “You don’t say? I’ve been waiting the past week for that answer. Now we can get somewhere. Tell me what it was.”

Remus did nothing. Sirius watched his eyes glaze over even more. He seemed to decide to go somewhere else, anywhere else. “Moony?”

Remus jolted at that. “I-I don’t want to.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow at him, even more annoyed. “Oh, you don’t? Do you want to go back to the playroom?”

Remus shook his head and seemed to actually consider which one he’d rather do. Sirius glared at him, leaning forward, to Remus’ ear. “It’s an easy choice. I have a new toy I’d love to use on you, it’s a muggle one,” he purred.

Remus shuddered, closing his eyes. “Please, no.”

Sirius sat up, tired, but not wanting to be woken up all night yet again. “Is that a no to telling me?”

Remus sighed and got up, too. Sirius watched his downcast eyes suspiciously, not trusting how easily he gave in. “Yes.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow at him and held his hand out. “That’s it? No fight, no begging?”

Remus took his hand as a reply. Sirius helped him up, leading him into the closet and pushing his coats aside for him and opening the door for him. Sirius watched him walk, limping, into the room. Sirius closed the door behind him and locked it.

“We’re likely going to be here for the rest of the night,” he warned.

He didn’t want to be here all night, he wanted _sleep_.

Remus looked over at him. “I thought this was a punishment for not telling.”

Sirius laughed lowly, amused, and shaking his head. The punishments weren’t working on Remus, that was good to know. “Oh, no. What good would that do, Remy?”

Remus actually looked a bit terrified for a second. “Then, why am I here?”

Sirius stalked forward and smirked at Remus. “You don’t want to tell me?”

Remus shook his head, backing away now. Sirius could practically hear him telling himself he should have run.

“Good. I’m going to get it out of you.”

Sirius grabbed Remus’ arm, who jerked back before he could stop himself. He was going to try to run away.

“Come, Moony, you can’t have expected me to just let you keep your secrets. Last chance.”

Remus shook his head. Sirius could see him steeling himself. “ _Je suis trop fatiguée pour ça_.”

He took Remus by the arm and led him to a chair, one that Remus seemed to have missed when they walked in. Before he could even try to get up, Sirius strapped him down.

“I’m going to ask one more time, Moony.”

Remus shook his head, closing his eyes. Sirius groaned and pulled the switch.

A thousand jolts of electricity went jolted through Remus’ body, Sirius watched every limb in his body stiffen and watched him shake from it and his eyes go wide. He let it work for a little bit and watched Remus’ hair rise from the electric current. He loved muggles.

Sirius flipped it off. “That... was art. Wanna tell me?”

Remus didn’t even get the chance to finish shaking his head before Sirius flipped the switch again. He was letting out these little grunting whimpers, Sirius could feel himself harden a bit from them.

He counted to ten, then switched it off. “I really don’t want to do this, Remy. I want to go to sleep, I’ll even let you go back to sleep. Just tell me.”

“This... this.... stupid.”

Sirius frowned. The muggles didn’t think this one through, Remus couldn’t even talk. Not to mention he was already out of breath.

“This needs work, does it?”

Remus looked up at Sirius, even though he was slumped over. Sirius walked forward and unstrapped him, but he didn’t get up. Quite the contrary, he fell to the ground.

“Unfortunately, I can’t use you for that, because you’re my favorite. If I accidentally kill you, I’ll feel a little bad.”

Remus groaned, Sirius liked to think in thanks. He didn’t get up.

Sirius sighed and picked him up. “Ugh, you’re getting heavy.”

Remus heaved a sigh, apparently having trouble. All of his muscles seemed to be twitching, Sirius could feel them. “Told you not to,” he gasped.

Sirius tilted his head from side to side. “What? Feed you, try to use that muggle thing on you?”

Remus shook his head and laid it on Sirius’ shoulder.

“Ohh,” Sirius feigned realization, “you mean carry you everywhere?”

Remus jerked his head in a nod as he was set on the table. “You need it.”

Sirius brought Remus’ hands up and spread his legs. He strapped them down and considered Remus.

“I’ve already cut you, I’ve already burned you, I’ve already drowned you, I’ve already beat you, I’ve already cursed you. Hm, what to do, what to do?”

Remus looked up at Sirius warily, it almost endeared him to him. “How about this?”

Sirius tapped his wand on the table. He watched Remus look confused, then watched his eyes widen. He loved this part. Sirius watched him start to shiver and let the temperature of the table get colder. As soon as Remus’ face twisted in pain, Sirius let the temperature freeze.

Sirius pointed his wand to the air above Remus and started to cool down the air around him. Remus was shivering, he was definitely in pain. The cold was burning him, through his clothes. Sirius decided to watch him get colder and colder, waited until his lips were blue before he spoke.

“Want to go back to bed? Our warm, cozy bed? I’ll stand by my promise to let you sleep. I’ll even sweeten the deal, give you a dreamless sleep potion.”

Remus’ eyes filled with tears, which gave Sirius an idea.

“P-pl-pleas-s-se.”

Sirius laughed and adjusted himself, making sure Remus saw.

“I enjoy this too much. I will choose this over sleep, every time. If you tell me, I’ll stop. And you’ve given me an idea.”

Sirius walked to the bottom of the table, made sure Remus was watching, then said loud enough for Remus to hear, “ _Aguamenti_.”

He pointed it at Remus’ toes. Remus gave a high pitched groan and tried to move. He, of course, couldn’t. Ten minutes passed where Sirius kept making the air get colder. Remus was freezing, he knew it, he may as well be out in the snow, or even just in a block of ice.

Sirius leaned over Remus’ head, felt the air, it was beyond freezing, and backed off. “Wow, that’s cold. It’s actually very warm in here, you know we’re in a heat wave, for some god-forsaken reason, in March. I’m sweating, Moony. Don’t you want to be warm with me, in bed?”

Remus nodded, his teeth chattering loudly inside of his mouth, Sirius didn’t know if he could talk. However, he did.

“I-I-I-I-It’s j-j-just a-a-a-a n-n-nightm-mare.”

Sirius scoffed, running his hands through his hair. It was his own sleep schedule, too, he normally got less than an hour a day.

“Exactly. Just a nightmare. Why are you guarding it?”

Remus looked at the ceiling, watched his breath appear around him. Sirius added more water to his toes. “I can break off your limbs like this, Moony.”

Remus looked down, at the ice already on his toes. Sirius raised an eyebrow at him. “Th-th-th-thought y-y-y-you d-did-d-d-dn’t w-want t-t-to d-d-d-do i-it.”

Sirius laughed. “Oh, I don’t. I enjoy this, once I start I find it hard to stop. But I’m at the point right now where I will stop right now if you tell me. See, here’s the problem. It’s eleven pm. I don’t want to be woken up all through one of the rare nights I get a full night’s sleep because you’re having nightmares. I’m not going to put you on the floor, because that’s for certain things. If I break that system, I may as well break all of my systems. You don’t want that, neither do I. I’m going to get to the bottom of this.”

Sirius started unbuttoning Remus’ shirt. He lifted up the back of the shirt, so Remus’ back was touching the table. He got off his shirt as much as possible and tried to get his arms out of his sleeves. When he was done, he watched him arch off of it and started on his bottoms, doing the same to them as he did with his shirt. 

Now Remus was mostly naked and definitely freezing. Sirius pointed his wand at his prick. “ _Aguamenti_.”

Remus whimpered as he felt the water start to freeze, over his cock. Sirius pointed his wand at his fingers. “I’ll freeze it all and break it off.”

Sirius started to go for Remus’ fingers, taking note of his whimpers and cries. Any second now, he was going to give in.

Unfortunately, he was likely going to get frostbite first.

Sirius wet his toes again, before starting to bend his big toe back and forth. It was definitely frozen.

“F-f-f-fine! T-t-t-take m-me off! T-t-t-t-t-take m-me o-o-off!”

Sirius waved his wand, unsurprised, and the table started to slowly heat up. “I’ll stop the spell heating up the table when it’s at normal temperature. Here,” Sirius heated up the air around Remus, “I don’t want to try to decipher your shivering. So, we’ll wait a few moments.”

Remus nodded, so Sirius sat down on the table. It was warmer now, so it felt like it’d been left out in the cold for a while. The cold soaked through his pajamas, which were silk in this stupid heat wave. “Speak.”

“Wh-wh-what do y-you w-w-want me t-t-to say?”

Sirius nodded. He looked around, thinking about how badly he needed someone to clean this room. “Should get a servant to clean in here,” he muttered.

Remus turned his head to the side, his teeth chattering in his closed mouth, but less. Sirius turned his head to look at Remus. “I wonder how badly it’d scar that little boy to clean up his dead parents’ blood.”

“D-don’t d-do th-th-that!”

Sirius looked down at Remus, looking bored. “Why not? It’d serve the little shite right.”

Remus shook his head frantically. He breathed slowly and closed his eyes while Sirius watched. “No, he doesn’t deserve th-that. No one does.”

Sirius regarded Remus for a long second, before standing up. “You’re lucky I like you. I think you take it for granted sometimes. But, that’s another conversation I’m not awake enough to have. Talk.”

Remus twisted his wrists in his restraints and closed his eyes. “Can I please be let up? Maybe we can go back to bed?”

Sirius regarded Remus suspiciously for a moment before starting to let him up. “I will wake you up by burning your arm over a fire if you don’t tell me.”

Remus rolled his wrist, then his next as Sirius let it up. Remus sat up, Sirius helped him up.

“You’re on such thin ice.”

Remus leaned onto Sirius, which made him pick him up, just ripping his clothes off and carrying them. He was still shaking.

“Talk to me while we walk.”

Remus leaned his head on Sirius’ shoulder and started. “As a young child, I liked to tell my father that there were monsters under my bed. My favorite monster to scream about was a werewolf. My father came into my room almost every night, to humor me, more than because he thought that there was an actual werewolf under my bed.”

They got to the bed, Sirius deposited Remus into it, tucking him in.

“My father got sick of it one night and gave me a lecture about the boy who cried werewolf. It was the night that I got bitten that he told me this story. My father didn’t come in that night. My mother did. She was a muggle.

“Fenrir Greyback was hiding under my bed. He-he clawed off my mother’s face, it’s the only way to describe it, down to her throat. I can still see the way his claws tore down her face and to her throat, it was like butter. He split one of her eyeballs open, her bottom lip came off. It happened in less than a second. I screamed half a second too late. He bit me, and left the room before my father could see him. He, of course, knew it was him. My father didn’t even look at me, even though I was the one screaming. He got on the floor with my mother, who he knew couldn’t be saved.

“I think my father lost any and all love for me that night. He blamed himself, as he should have. He was the one who opened the window, one would think he’d done it on purpose. But, he saved me that night, as much as I resent it. He let me become the creature that killed the only love of his life. Until I was twelve, I lived with him.

“I think being accepted into Hogwarts pushed him over the edge. He wanted to get rid of me, by then. The idea of someone ever finding out that his son was a werewolf pushed him to do what he did.

“I came home. I’d made no friends at Hogwarts, but I, even now, can’t describe how much I loved learning. I wanted to figure out everything I could, wanted to read every book in the world, as I told my father in the car as he drove me to that place. When we pulled up to a building I didn’t know, I was confused.

“He got out, which made me get out. I didn’t notice when he didn’t close the door. As Folgens came out, he got back in, locked the doors, and drove away. I remember screaming and crying, trying to run away. All that happened was I got whipped, I was the last that night, and I got three hours. Between the pain and all the confusion and the hurt that my father, the only thing I had, did this, I screamed until I passed out.

“There. Happy? That’s what the nightmares are about and I’d pay you in all of my pocket lint if you got rid of them.”

Sirius stared at Remus, a few beats to long. Remus closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, turning over to go back to sleep.

“Wait, don’t just leave me with that!”

Remus shifted. “I’m not allowed to leave. I’m sleeping.”

“Wait! Sleep later!”

Remus turned back around. “You promised.”

“You didn’t tell me I’d have so much to process. Just, lay still for a moment. I have questions.”

Remus sighed and closed his eyes. Sirius watched him, trying to wrap his head around it.

It would explain Remus’ defiance, his unwillingness to behave. He didn’t want to behave, he wouldn’t give in when he knew what another life was. He likely fantasized about what his life could have been.

It would explain Lyall Lupin’s obsession with werewolves, yes, but also his obsession with becoming powerful. He gave up his entire life for his career, his son. He lost his wife to his career, Sirius knew it was what he said about werewolves around that time that made Greyback target his family. Not to mention all of the slave laws he kept trying to pass. He was plagued with guilt. He wanted them legal again, wanted what he did to be normal for parents to do to children. Especially werewolf children.

Remus tended to sleep loudly. Sirius had heard him scream, cry. A lot of it made sense, now. He wondered how to make that part better.

Another thing clicked in Sirius’ head.

“Remus. Are-Are you _scared_ of being returned?”

Remus’ eyes, which were drooping shut, snapped open. “I thought I made that clear.”

Sirius gave Remus a light glare. “No. Not like that. I remember having to take you out one time, though I forgot why. You looked terrified, you sat next to me without me asked, closer than you had to be. We drove in the direction of the market, if I remember, and you put on your seatbelt. Discreetly, but I saw.”

Again, Remus nodded slowly, as if Sirius were slow. “You’ve given Folgens far too many reasons to punish me for me not to be scared. This is the longest I’ve ever been kept, forgive me for being a bit wary.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow at Remus. “You’re deliberately misinterpreting my question. You tend to watch me leave, you follow me sometimes for no reason, when I haven’t asked you to. Sometimes I find you on my side of the bed, whether you do it subconsciously or not, when I go to bed.”

Remus turned his head away. Sirius thought about the story some more, trying to get all the details. “You hate when the window is open.”

Remus nodded. Sirius turned it over again in his head. Remus’ eyes also went beneath the bed every day, when he came into the room. He loved muggle books, he read them all the time, more than he read wizarding books. He didn’t want the little boy cleaning up his parent’s blood.

“Dreamless sleep potion?”

Remus nodded, on his back and burying his face in his hands. Sirius got out of bed and dug through his nightstand, finding the little vial and uncapping it.

“Just drink the whole thing. I need to get more, anyway.”

Remus downed the bottle without another word, and turned over. Sirius watched him for a second, seeing it set in.

“Moony.”

Remus sluggishly turned over, his eyes were barely open. “You’re going to stop using occulmency.”

Remus blinked slowly, obviously about to say something. However, his eyes didn’t open again, and he went limp. Sirius sighed and groaned. He usually used that potion, himself.

Sirius inched closer, not knowing if this was smart. Well no, this wasn’t at all smart, he knew that. But, he needed _something_. 

Carefully, he wrapped his arms around Remus. He held himself still for a second, before relaxing a little bit.

This was nice. He liked this, Remus felt warm. He got a little closer, starting to play with Remus’ hair. He wanted to cry, he could feel Remus’ breath on his neck. They were very close right now, he wanted to get closer.

He was on Remus’ pillow, now. Well, more like he _was_ Remus’ pillow. This was very nice, very comfortable. Sirius wanted to squeeze Remus to him chest and keep him there. 

He didn’t want him to struggle, though.

Sirius fell asleep, one of his hands in Remus’ hair and the other over his pulse point on his wrist, feeling his heartbeat.

-.-

Sirius woke up to Regulus walking in. Well, no, he woke up to Regulus shouting at him.

“Siri!”

Sirius jumped, feeling a weight on top of his chest. He looked down and saw Remus, saw his hand in his hair and on his wrist.

He carefully untangled himself from Remus, making sure he was still asleep.

“What time is it,” he asked groggily, rubbing his eyes.

Regulus rubbed his temples. “It’s seven. Lyra will be here with her mother any minute.”

Sirius groaned. “Her mother’s not staying, right?”

Regulus shook his head. “No. Get _up_. Why is he in your bed? Why is he _naked?_ ”

Sirius glanced at Remus, who was stirring. “Because I want him here. Don’t worry, Lyra will like him.”

Regulus gave Sirius a dark glare. “I don’t want her knowing about your... activities with the servants.”

Sirius shrugged, watching Remus wake up. He looked the best he’d looked since Sirius purchased him. “I’ll talk to him.”

Regulus left the room, shutting the door behind him. Remus was sitting up, yawning. “It worked?”

Remus nodded and flopped back down, making Sirius grab the blankets.

“We need to get up ten minutes ago. Come.”

Remus groaned and flipped himself off of the bed. He sat up on the floor and yawned again. Sirius walked around the bed to help him up.

“Reg will kill me if we’re not up when his kid gets here. I think we have time to get dressed. Just a quick warning, she likes to meet the servants, she doesn’t like to be catered to, and she’s going to want to make friends with you.”

Remus nodded as he was offered a shirt. He put it on and the trousers he was offered. He still wasn’t allowed to wear pants.

He got a jacket, though.

“You can’t mention any of this,” Sirius poked one of Remus’ bruises, “to her. She assumes you guys want to be here, we don’t correct her. She’s exceptionally bright, probably knows somethings amiss, but she’s also seven.”

Remus sat on the bed, still tired. He nodded, rubbing his eyes.

“Do you remember anything from, er, after you fell asleep last night?”

Remus looked up at Sirius, suddenly awake. “No,” he said slowly, “should I?”

Sirius stared at Remus for a long moment before shaking his head. “Just checking for nightmares,” he said lightly.

Remus glared at Sirius, not believing him, which was fair, Sirius thought. Dreamless sleep potion worked very well, it was common knowledge. “Did you do anything that I should know about?”

Sirius glared back at Remus, even though it was very fair that he was wary. “ _No_. I just woke up... a little close to you.”

The suspicion slipped from Remus’ face, to be replaced with surprise. He blinked once, twice, before studying Sirius’ face carefully.

Something about Sirius’ face must have given him away, because Remus suddenly let out a short, surprised, laugh and touched the back of his head. “Di-did you _cuddle_ with me?”

Sirius gave Remus a death glare and crossed his arms, sticking his nose in the air. “You took my dreamless sleep potion,” he started stiffly, “I didn’t—”

“Let’s just get one thing clear,” Remus interrupted, “you offered it to me, I accepted it.”

The door opened. Remus covered his mouth, trying not to laugh, as a little girl walked in. Sirius knelt down as she ran into his arms.

“Hey, Lyra!”

Lyra was a mini version of Bellatrix, except she had freckles, a small gap between her left canine and her front tooth, and she had teeny, tiny, ears. They were Regulus’ ears.

She was also far too thin, Sirius noticed.

“Hi, Siri! I missed you!”

Sirius held her back at arms length and smiled. “I missed you, too! Oh, look how big you’ve gotten!”

Lyra beamed at that, one wouldn’t have even noticed that she was with her mother a few minutes ago.

Remus shifted, turning to the windowsill. Sirius shot him a look and turned back to Lyra, who had caught sight of him.

“Wow! Am I gonna be that big one day?”

Sirius laughed and ruffled her hair. “You come from a family of very tall people, so maybe.”

Lyra broke away from Sirius and turned to Remus. “Hi.”

Remus looked up at Sirius, terrified. “Hi.”

Sirius rolled his eyes and knelt down behind Lyra again. “This is Remus. He’s new.”

Lyra didn’t take her eyes from Remus, her head was tilted to the side. “What happened to your face?”

Sirius face-palmed behind Lyra. He forgot about those. Sirius watched Remus kneel down and touch a small scar on her face, “What happened to yours?”

Lyra’s eyes widened, and she stuttered, “A-An evil c-clown took m-me in-into the sewer a-and I barely e-escaped wh-when he tried t-to eat me.”

Bless seven year olds, they could barely lie without stuttering. Or, at least the ones with anxiety.

Remus’ eyes found Sirius, who shrugged. Remus closed his eyes and looked at Lyra. “That’s a really cool story. It sounds a lot like a book I once read, called It. Have you heard of it?”

Lyra nodded slowly. “My mother has it at home.”

Remus inclined his head. “You’ve read it? That’s very advanced.”

She nodded excitedly, her eyes going wide. “I really liked it! My favorite character was Beverly, I thought she was so brave! I especially liked when she stood up to her mean boyfriend!”

Remus sat on the floor, Lyra following. “Really? I think my favorite part was the part where she visited her father, only to find the old lady who was the clown there. I thought that was a nice touch, especially because she was there to try to face him.”

Lyra smiled brightly, while Sirius watched. “It was! What’s your favorite book?”

Remus stopped a second, to consider the question. “I think that would have to be The Outsiders. Have you read that one?”

Lyra shook her head. Remus looked surprised for a minute. “Really?”

Lyra nodded, but she looked excited, she obviously wanted to read it. Sirius crossed over to his bookshelf, looking for the book. He didn’t have it.

“I don’t seem to have that one.”

They both watched Lyra’s face fall, though for a second, before she smiled again. “I think I can ask my mother! She might let me get it.”

“No,” Sirius told her, “Remus and I will go out and find the book for you when you leave, okay? Next time you come, it’ll be on the bookshelf.”

Lyra’s entire face lit up. “Really?”

Sirius nodded. “Yes, really. Now, can you go back to your dad, he won’t like me hogging up your company.”

Lyra nodded, eyes bright and jumped up, running to find Regulus. Before she left, she stopped. “Can I visit him for often?”

She pointed at Remus, who looked surprised. Sirius knelt down. “Ask your dad, okay?”

She nodded and ran from the room. Sirius knew Regulus would give her what she wanted, almost as an apology for the situation he got her stuck in.

Sirius straightened up and turned to Remus. Remus was staring at the door, almost surprised.

“Up. I need to get rid of those, she’ll ask again.”

Sirius watched Remus get up and started healing the cuts and bruises on his face. “Do you know where to get that book?”

Remus shrugged. “Any muggle bookshop.”

Sirius nodded, focusing on the bruises fading from Remus’ face. “You’ll have to come with me. You’re good with kids?”

Remus shrugged again. “No. I don’t talk to children, I’m never around them. You are?”

Sirius tilted his head from side to side. “Only her. She reminds me a lot of a younger me.”

Remus shuddered. “Thanks for telling me what she’ll end up like.”

Sirius glared at Remus, even as he healed his wounds. “Not likely,” There was a pause, “Hey! Don't _sigh in relief!_ I’m a goddamn delight!”

Remus put his hands up, looking fearful. “Fine! Your great, wonderful to be around, especially when you’re angry!”

Sirius glared darkly at Remus. “Don’t get smart with me.”

Remus shrugged as Sirius stepped back. “Why did I count seven different injuries on her?”

Sirius bit his cheek. “Her mother. She was... resentful when Regulus left her. Remember Bella?”

Remus nodded.

“She’s ten times worse than Bella. We’ve been trying to get Lyra back for the past seven years.”

Remus seemed to think about that for a second. Sirius picked up his wand and pointed in the direction of his office.

“Come on, I have work to do.”

Remus followed Sirius down the hall, where they entered his office. Sirius sat down in his chair as Remus sat in his.

Remus had a book in his jacket that he took out and started reading. Sirius watched him for a moment before he got to work. There were several laws that apparently were in dire need of being passed.

There was a knock on the door. Sirius looked up, Regulus and Lyra tended to just barge in. He wasn’t supposed to have any visitors today.

Was he?

“Get under my desk, quick.”

Remus shot Sirius a look, but did as he was told, just as the door opened.

“I have the new drafts of the Werewolf Code of Conduct.”

Remus practically jumped out of his skin, Sirius felt it. He put his hand under the desk and forced his head down onto his knee.

“Hello, Lyall. Just set them on my desk, I’ll go over them after this last set of laws you sent me.”

Remus was shaking. Whether from repressed fury or fear, Sirius couldn’t tell but could take a guess.

Lyall sat down. Sirius shot him a quick look, but let him sit.

“Anything else?”

Lyall leaned back in his chair, crossing his ankle over his leg, so unlike his son. He seemed a lot more confident. “Yes. What do you, personally, think of the laws I’ve drafted?”

Sirius looked down at his papers, the ones describing what wizards should do to werewolves and why they should hunt them for sport.

“Do you have a personal grudge against werewolves?”

Lyall seemed ready for this question. He didn’t even hesitate with his response. “Are you an apologist for them?”

Sirius raised an eyebrow, unfazed. “Already jumping to defend yourself over a question? Simple one, really, especially for someone who seems to be obsessed with them.”

Lyall looked like he was constipated, his face went red and he bit his cheek, clenching his teeth.

Sirius moved his hand to Remus’ hair, in his lap. Lyall noticed, but didn’t comment on it.

“No,” he started stiffly, “It just makes me extremely uncomfortable that no one can recognize these beasts, and they’re everywhere, they can prey on whoever they want. One of your servants may be a werewolf. You may not know.”

Remus bit down on Sirius’ leg. It was light, but Sirius sighed, nonetheless. “Actually, I have a werewolf on my staff, I knew the moment I laid eyes on him. Would you like to meet him? Now that I think about it, he looks a bit like you. Are you hiding something?”

Lyall’s eyes went wide and he paled. He jumped up. “No, no, that’s fine. I-I must be going, consider the laws, please, thank you!”

He jumped up and left the office, without giving Sirius a chance to respond. That was a very quick switch.

Sirius pushed back his chair and looked down at Remus. “Did you have to bite me?”

Remus nodded silently, his face completely impassive. Sirius sighed and knelt down on the floor in front of him, from his chair.

“You’re going to have to get used to him being around. He was supposed to come tomorrow, though. I was supposed to get the time to prepare you for this.”

Remus looked away. He was still quiet. Sirius wiped a stray tear from his face. “You did better than I thought you would.”

Remus glared at the floor, his jaw jutted out. “You didn’t have to tell him that I’m here,” he muttered.

“I did. You’re going to be in plain sight next time he comes over.”

Remus’ eyes snapped to Sirius’. “What? No, I’m not!”

Sirius leaned forward, grabbing Remus’ chin and jerking it forward. “I just said you are. End of discussion.”

Remus tried to shake his head, but Sirius was holding him in place. “I can’t.”

Sirius shrugged, running a thumb over Remus’ bottom lip. “Not my problem.”

Sirius got back up on the chair, starting to do his work again. Remus closed his eyes and laid his head back down, Sirius allowing it.

“Do you want to read the laws?”

Remus shook his head and kept his head down. “You’re sure you don’t want to kill me?”

Sirius laughed. “No. You should have asked me before I got attached.”

Remus shakily sighed. “I did, you just refused to.”

Sirius looked down at him and sighed, too. He liked that picture.

Sirius smirked and closed his eyes. Fuck it. He’d been switching positions on this for the last week, not knowing if it were wise. He didn’t care, he knew he didn’t. He wanted this too much, he’d wanted it since he laid eyes on Remus.

The time passed painstakingly slowly. Sirius signed documents, went over laws, and highlighted places he didn’t like. The time passed, and Remus stayed where he was, though he took out his book. Sirius looked down and ran a hand through Remus’ hair, prompting him to look up.

“You may as well go. I don’t think I have anything for you to be present for. Lyra will be here for the next few weeks.”

Remus nodded and got up. Sirius watched him leave, or, at least, watched his arse as he left.

He checked the time, and then his workload. He sighed.

Maybe tomorrow, but very likely not today.

-.-

Sirius was done. He looked around, at the clock, and sighed. Two am.

He got up, and, deciding he may as well, stretched and took a detour to the kitchen. There were no servants in the kitchen at this time, even though Sirius was usually up.

He made himself a mug of hot chocolate and added a few shots of tequila to it, to help him sleep. He finished it in the kitchen, putting the cup by the sink, and maybe he added a bit too much tequila.

Or maybe he shouldn’t have had three shots of tequila while making his hot chocolate, and then had the few in his hot chocolate. He was feeling a little more than tipsy as he made his way up the stairs. Maybe he shouldn’t have chugged it.

He opened the door to his room, and immediately noticed that Remus wasn’t there. Sirius went into the bathroom, knowing Remus was probably there.

Oh, he found Remus. He found Remus on the toilet, his cock in his hand.

Remus’ eyes flew open, he caught sight of Sirius, and he fumbled to tuck himself in, but Sirius had already crossed over to him.

“Don’t do that.”

Remus stopped. “Don’t do what?”

Sirius looked down and then back at Remus’ face. “Get in bed, exactly how you are now.”

Remus didn’t do as he was told, he studied Sirius’ face, instead. “Are you... drunk?”

Sirius shook his head. “No! No. I had spiked hot chocolate, but I didn’t have much.”

Remus stared at his face, squinting. “Your cheeks are red and you’re slurring your words. Not to mention, what you’re telling me to do. I think you need to go to sleep.”

Sirius raised his eyebrows, though his face felt numb. “I don’t care what you think, do what you’re told.”

Remus didn’t move. “You need to go to sleep.”

Sirius rubbed his face, annoyed. He didn’t want a fight, he wanted to get what he wanted. He grabbed Remus’ arm and dragged him from the bathroom to the bed. He threw him onto the bed and crawled on top of him before he could get up.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this.”

Remus stared up at him, fumbling to tuck himself back in. Sirius didn’t look at that, he smirked and stared at his face. He tried to kiss Remus, but was pushed back.

“You don’t want to do this.”

Sirius looked down at Remus, trying to bite his hand. Then, he looked down at his trousers and noticed that he was completely covered up by them. “I didn’t tell you to do that.”

Sirius watched Remus’ face watching his eyes dart from side to side. It made Sirius feel so satisfied that he felt trapped and was looking for an escape, any escape. “Listen to me!”

Oh, he was scared. “Don’t tell me what to do. I don’t want to listen, I want to shag.”

Sirius tilted his head. Remus was shaking, he didn’t want that. He was pretty sure he didn’t. He wanted him to listen to him, though. Remus was still watching him, and seeing his hesitation.

“You need to go to sleep. You’re drunk, you’re going to regret this. I-I shouldn’t have done that, but I didn’t know you’d come in. I’ll lock the door, next time, just stop!”

Sirius shook his head. He knew he wanted this. Being drunk meant nothing. “No. I want this. I’ve wanted it, I like your body.”

Remus closed his eyes. “You need sleep, you need to think this through.”

“I’ve thought it through all week!”

Remus flinched. “Okay! But you’re drunk, sober up before doing this!”

Sirius put his knees on the bed and sat up, realizing that he _was_ drunk. “I’m drunk.”

Remus nodded frantically. “Yes. You’re drunk. You’re going to regret it, especially if you’re drunk.”

Sirius nodded and let himself fall onto his pillow. Remus sat up.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Remus sighed. “I’m not. You’re still fully clothed, you’re not under the covers.”

Sirius looked down at Remus, who was pulling off his boots. When they were off, he moved Sirius’ legs off the bed and sat him up.

Remus peeled back the covers and put Sirius’ legs back up. He put the covers back on Sirius and went to his side of the bed. As he got in, Sirius held his arms open.

Remus looked at him for a moment. “What do you want?”

Sirius shook his arms a little. “Get over here.”

Remus raised his eyebrows. “I don’t think you—”

“I liked it a lot last night and it helped my nightmares. Get over here.”

Remus cautiously moved closer and let himself relax a little, a good foot away from Sirius.

Sirius sighed and got closer, pulled Remus to his chest. Remus stiffened up and shakily sighed.

“Isn’t this nice?”

Remus closed his eyes. “How long to you want me here?”

Sirius made an an angry noise. “All night. You’re saying this isn’t all warm and nice for you?”

Remus sighed. “It’s fine.”

Sirius groaned. “Why is this so hard for you?”

Remus rubbed his fist on his forehead and bit his cheek. “Why is it so hard for you to go one day without strapping me to that _goddamn_ table?”

Sirius blinked, considering the question. “I don’t know. It’s kind of how I was raised. It’s comfortable, you do something wrong, I keep you in line, and you are too scared to break the rules again. If I do something wrong, I take it out on you. My mother told me that’s how I’m supposed to be, and I was safe from her when I agreed. You’re a little different, though. I like to hug you, apparently. I like being close to you. You’re very fit, and I get turned on from your tears. I remember the first time I _crucio_ ’d you, I was so hard when your tears touched my hand. Usually, I have to have the blood on my hands, I have to feel that I’m hurting them. It’s weird with you.”

Remus was silent, Sirius thought he’d fallen asleep.

“You’re terrible. Like, you’re sick, mentally ill, you need help.”

Sirius sighed. “I told you you’re my favorite.”

Remus shook his head. He seemed to be too disgusted to speak.

Sirius started petting his hair and grabbed his wrist to feel his heartbeat. “I’m not sorry.”

Remus shifted to get more comfortable. “I know you’re not. You’re not capable of that.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Go to sleep. We’re going to finish what what you started tonight, but tomorrow.”

Sirius felt a shiver go up Remus’ spine. He rubbed his spine and tucked him more securely under the blankets. “Don’t try to run or avoid me.”

Remus closed his eyes again and Sirius pet his hair again. He just wanted him to go to sleep.

Remus did end up falling asleep. So did Sirius.

Neither had any nightmares that night.


	4. Chapter 4

Well.

Remus wasn’t avoiding him, not exactly. He hadn’t seen Remus outside his office in four days. Sirius woke up with Remus already out of bed, nowhere in sight, but he was there, in his office, when Sirius started working.

When Sirius got to bed, Remus wasn’t there, but he’d woken up in the night to Remus crawling into bed many times. He knew Remus didn’t want Sirius waking him up, like he knew he would. But, Sirius was too tired to do anything other than fall back asleep when Remus crawled in bed with him.

He didn’t pull Remus close, though he knew he wanted to. He also didn’t know how Remus was getting up in the morning, but he always woke up with Remus gone.

He also didn’t know where he went, but he dutifully showed up in his office every day. He usually could act as if he hadn’t gone anywhere, Sirius noticed.

That’s how they got here. Remus was sitting awkwardly in Sirius’ office, Sirius was going over laws that apparently needed to be passed the next day. Sirius looked up at Remus.

“Your father will be here in a few minutes.”

Remus looked up from his book. “May I go, then?”

Sirius smirked, Remus knew he couldn’t leave. “No. I’m giving you a warning. _Maybe_ if you stayed in a room with me, for more than a second, while I had some free time to tell you, you would have gotten a better warning, even a potion to help.”

Remus slumped down in his chair, just as there was a knock on the door. He jumped up, but Sirius pointed his wand at him.

“Sit. Down.”

Remus looked at Sirius’ wand and slowly sat back down, hunching over and burying his face in his book. Sirius looked at him, before looking back up when the door opened.

“I have— who’s that?”

Sirius smirked and sat back down. “It’s my favorite servant. Sit, sit.”

Lyall looked over at Remus before sitting down slowly and stiffly. “I have the new drafts of the laws you wanted.”

Sirius took the papers and watched Lyall give Remus a quick side glance. Remus was staring resolutely at his book, his jaw set.

Lyall buried his eyes behind his hand, asking, “Aren't servants supposed to blend in. I’m not supposed to be able to see him.”

Sirius stood up, going around his desk and leaning on it. “Most, but have you seen this one,” he got in front of Remus and planted himself in his lap, forcing Remus to look up and making both Remus’ and Lyall’s eyes go wide, “he’s _bloody_ fit. I love to look at him, I want everyone to see him. I could just eat him up. I’m going to, later,” Sirius muttered the last part, though both could hear him.

Remus tried to move, but Sirius kept himself planted down. Sirius lifted his chin with one finger, “Oh, no. You’re going to keep leaving the room when I walk in and make sure I don’t see you for more than a second outside this office? Fine, I won’t see you outside the office.”

Remus took a shaky breath as his cheeks flushed. Sirius smirked as he felt Remus’ cock fill beneath him.

He leaned in to Remus’ ear, whispering, “I should get up right now, show your father the real reason he should have sold you.”

Remus closed his eyes. Sirius wiped a tear from under his eye, under the pretense of rubbing his cheekbone. Sirius looked over at Lyall. “Hm. He doesn’t look as much like you as I initially thought. Must take after his mother, eh?”

Lyall went red, and shot a fierce glare at Remus. Sirius saw, and got up, discreetly leaving his jacket.

“Hold that for me, will you?”

Sirius leaned back on his desk, glaring at Lyall. “I can get you fired. Hell, I can fire you right now.”

Lyall bit his cheek and went a little red. Sirius knew he hated how easily he had gotten the position he was in, how easily he was still rising.

He could become minister of magic if he wanted, but he didn’t want that. He wanted _real_ power, not the kind that made people revolt.

Remus shifted uncomfortably. Sirius glanced at him, but didn’t pay him too much attention. “Do not look at _my_ servant like that. Especially, _especially_ after what you did. Do you know what I had to put him through to get him to tell the story? Torture, Veritaserum, the works. I almost killed myself, just trying to figure out why he wanted to kill himself!”

Lyall looked uncomfortable. “It was for the best.”

Remus bit his lip, Sirius saw. “Something to say?”

Remus’ eyes found Sirius’ and he shook his head.

“No?”

Remus shook his head again and looked at Sirius’ shoes. Sirius could see an entire storm brewing under his mask.

Sirius shrugged and said, “Tell me later.”

Remus’ face was impassive, Sirius realized. He smirked, he loved that he could see that.

“As I was going to say, no, it wasn’t. It was best for your motives and what you wanted. You were selfish, you are a disgrace to your dead wife, and you are lucky I don’t get you arrested.”

Lyall opened his mouth and then shut it. It seemed for a second, he was ashamed of himself. However, Sirius misread him.

He jumped up and pointed his wand at Remus. Remus put his hands up and looked at Sirius automatically.

“You! _You_ — I got rid of you to prevent this!”

Sirius put his head down, then poked his wand into Lyall’s neck. “Leave before you hurt yourself,” he told him, his fury barely contained.

It was the trigger Lyall seemed to need. He hit Remus with a curse, but turned on his heel, sweeping from the office.

Sirius got him with a curse, too. He slid down in front of Remus and pulled his hands from his face. Lyall seemed to have triggered a bit of the transformation, Remus’ teeth were growing into fangs, his eyes were turning yellow, and his nails were growing into claws.

Sirius saw the panic in his eyes and quickly waved his wand. It stopped, and and started to undo itself.

“Go back to our room.”

Remus got up and almost ran to their room. Sirius watched him, wondering if he’d be there when he was done working.

Well, it didn’t matter, because he _was_ done working. He stood up and left the office. He made his way to his room, just in time to see Remus’ foot disappear behind the curtain.

He walked over to the curtain and pulled it open, to see Remus staring out the window. He realized that he never checked the windows.

Sirius watched Remus turn his head to him, at the same time he watched Lyall disappear. His eyes and nose were red, his cheeks were flushed. There were tear stains running down his cheeks.

“Done for the day,” he asked, going for casual.

Sirius nodded and sat on the bed. He usually didn’t have this much free time, he almost didn’t know what to do with it. Almost.

“C’mere.”

He watched Remus hesitate for a second before he got off the ledge and onto the bed. Sirius pulled him into his lap and wrapped his arms around his waist. “I could have told you.”

Remus sighed. Sirius ran his hands up and down his back, making him relax. “I-I didn’t want to do—”

“And would you look at that? I have you right where I’ve wanted you for the past week and a half. And you’re a mess, because you were avoiding what was going to happen this entire time.”

Remus tried to squirm away from Sirius, but Sirius was holding him down by his waist. He tried to grab his hands and take them off of him, but Sirius squeezed his waist until he let go.

“Stop fighting. That’s a fucking order.”

Remus stopped, trying to get his hands under Sirius’ to rub the bruises.

Sirius slapped his hands away and did it himself, watching Remus’ face. He knew that Remus needed something that could make him feel at least a little better.

He pulled Remus’ chin down and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. He could practically feel Remus melting in his hands. He ran his hands up and down Remus’ back, then let them travel to either side of his face. 

He pulled away. “I’m going to do this. You’re very likely going to love it. Is that what you’re scared of? Liking it?”

Remus shook his head. “It looked painful.”

Sirius’ brow furrowed. “When?”

Remus seemed to nod towards the market, though it was in London and they were in France, but didn’t say it.

“That, er, wasn’t what it’s usually like.”

Sirius knew that Remus at least knew that it was against their will, but it seemed like he didn’t know that sex was usually pleasurable for both sides.

Remus raised his eyebrows, looking confused. “There’s no blood? Or screaming? It’s not painful?”

Sirius tilted his head to the side. “You can’t have thought that that’s what it’s like. Do you know how hard it would be for men to convince a woman to sleep with them? Not to mention gay bottoms wouldn’t exist.”

Remus shrugged, muttering sheepishly, “That’s what it seemed like.”

Sirius closed his eyes, a little annoyed. “Okay, no. I’m not going to explain it, I’m going to show you. You’re going to let me.”

Remus bit his lip, closing his eyes. Sirius could tell he thought that he was lying. That was fair, he wasn’t always truthful with Remus, because he didn’t suit him all the time.

He flipped them around and pressed another kiss to Remus’ lips. He leaned down over Remus and started unbuttoning his shirt. “Are you scared?”

Remus nodded. Sirius ran his thumbs over Remus’ nipples and went down to bus bottoms. “Hm. I shouldn’t be enjoying this so much.”

He pulled down his bottoms and ran his hands over Remus’ thighs. “I said I’d eat you right up, didn’t I?”

Remus didn’t reply, he was staring at the ceiling. Sirius knew he didn’t want to do this.

However, he was hardening under Sirius’ breath.

Sirius crawled back up Remus’ body, trying to decide what he’d do first. Sirius pressed a kiss to his neck, getting a breathy sigh. He smirked and moved his mouth a little, latched onto his pulse point. He pressed his hips to Remus’, making sure he could feel Remus getting hard beneath him.

He moved his mouth down, finding one of Remus’ nipples and biting down a little. He soothed the bite with his tongue before moving again. Remus let out a scared little noise at that, but he seemed to like it. Sirius’ fingers found his arse. “What did he do to the men? Did he prep them at all?”

Remus’ confused look said enough, Sirius rolled his eyes and looked down at Remus’ arse, making sure it was clean. Then, when it passed his inspection, he lowered his mouth to it and gave it a broad lick.

“Wh-what are you doing?”

Sirius looked up at Remus, whose face was flushed and eyes were wide. As if to answer, he licked over Remus’ entrance again, making Remus’ legs fall open wider. Sirius smirked and held Remus’ cheeks apart, giving himself better access.

Remus was letting out reluctant little moans, trying to cover his mouth. Sirius saw and lifted his mouth up, blowing over the wet skin.

“Hold yourself open for me.”

Remus looked down at Sirius and lowered his hands to spread himself open for Sirius. “Look at me.”

Remus blinked down at him but looked down at Sirius. When Sirius licked over him again, he whimpered. It made it so much more intense, not being able to look away.

Sirius smirked and started prodding at Remus’ entrance with his tongue. Remus whined as Sirius got it in, fucking Remus with it.

Sirius poked a finger in, humming when he was stretched enough for Sirius to add a finger. Remus whimpered at the vibrations, and tried to arch down. Sirius added another finger and started to push some spit in with his tongue.

He twisted his fingers and started to move them in and out of Remus. Sirius took his mouth away. “Let go, put your hands by your head, don’t move them.”

Remus did as he was told, making Sirius smirk. “Does it feel good?”

Remus nodded tentatively, not wanting Sirius to stop because of it. Sirius added another finger and twisted them again. “Good. It’s _supposed_ to.”

With that, Sirius took his cock out, which was leaking. Remus jumped back and yelped, “ _That’s_ supposed to fit in my arse?”

Sirius looked down and then back up at Remus. “Get over here.”

Remus shook his head and tried to grab the blankets. Sirius rolled his eyes and pulled Remus into his arms and lap. He sighed and held his cock still, pushing it into Remus. Remus gasped and tried to squirm away at the burning stretch. Sirius held him still and pushed himself in the rest of the way.

Remus’ face was buried in Sirius’ neck and he was whimpering. Sirius’ hands went to his cock and felt that it had softened a little. Sirius pushed back his foreskin and rubbed over his exposed head, making Remus’ hips buck.

Remus whined and tried to squirm again. All it did was make a shiver run up his back and he tried to find that angle again.

Sirius smirked, holding Remus still. “Can I move?”

Remus nodded frantically, trying to move and find that angle again. “What was that?”

Sirius smirked and angled his hips, finding Remus’ prostate. Remus jolted as the pleasure got a lot more intense. “F-fuck.”

Sirius slapped his thigh, making Remus yelp and clench around him. “Don’t curse.”

Remus nodded and let Sirius manoeuvre him down onto his back. “That was my personal favorite part of the male anatomy. Just wait until I make you come from it.”

Sirius held Remus’ wrists down by his head, leaning down to kiss him again, starting to move his hips. Unlike with most of his partners, he started slow, surprisingly. As much as he liked seeing Remus’ face twist in pain and fear, he loved seeing and feeling him shiver in pleasure. He especially loved how easily he submitted to Sirius.

Sirius started to go faster, nailing his prostate every time. Remus could barely get a breath in from it, Sirius leaned down to kiss him yet again. This time, it was all tongue, it was sloppy, and their noses bumped together and their teeth clashed. Sirius went down to his neck, sucking wherever he could. He saw the hickeys he was leaving and tried to leave more. Remus was moaning, louder than Sirius would have expected.

Sirius bit down as he felt a heat building up in his gut. Remus’ moans were getting breathier and more frantic. Sirius bit down on his shoulder, and Remus came between them. Sirius smirked and went faster, feeling Remus’ walls pulse around him. He came quickly after that, twitching and pulsing inside of Remus. He rode it out, making Remus try to close his legs, so Sirius held them open.

Sirius pulled out, watching some of his come dribble out. He licked his lips like it was one of the most delicious things he’d ever seen. Remus tried to close his legs again, not succeeding. Sirius looked up at him and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“See? Not so bad.”

Remus rubbed his wrists, which were bruised with Sirius’ handprints, just as his hips were.

“I’ll get a salve for that. Come here, you need a bath.”

It was true. Remus was sweaty and covered in tears and come and Sirius’ saliva. Well, his face was covered in tears, but they were dry now. So was the saliva. And the come was drying.

Sirius tucked himself in and pulled Remus out of bed. Sirius, knowing he’d fall into him, caught Remus and wrapped his jacket around him.

“Are you okay? You’re not speaking.”

Remus shrugged, hugging the jacket around himself. Sirius frowned. It made him uneasy, even though Remus wasn’t the most talkative person.

Sirius drew the bath and got in, getting his wand out and vanishing his own clothes, gesturing for Remus to join him. Remus put the jacket on the toilet and got in.

Sirius pulled him back and let him lean into him. Then he groaned.

“I always forget about this,” he muttered.

Remus looked up, Sirius ran his hands through his hair, making him lean into his chest a little.

The was very nice. Sirius usually hated the after part of sex, or at least the aftercare that was required to practice d&s and s&m, hated having to deal with the numbness and emotions.

Sirius leaned down and kissed him again, except this time it was slowly, nicely. Remus made a startled noise in his throat, but he kissed back. Sirius ran his hands over Remus’ body.

“Okay, it’s pretty late, late enough. We’re going to go to sleep after I’ve healed your bruises. I’m knackered, I know you are, too. So, I think you should sleep too. It’s going to hurt for a few days, we won’t shag until the pain has gone away.”

Remus nodded, his eyes going to the rim of the tub. “Why now?” He whispered.

Sirius kissed Remus’ forehead, telling him, “I’m happy you’ve found your voice. You wouldn’t stay in the same room with me long enough for me to do it sooner.”

Sirius heard Remus mutter something indistinguishable under his breath. He didn’t question it, he knew he had to tread lightly right now.

Sirius took the sponge and started scrubbing at Remus’ legs. “You’re going to stop avoiding me. We’re past that, aren’t we?”

Remus nodded. “Good. Now, occlumency.”

Remus groaned quietly, closing his eyes. “It wasn’t a problem before,” he whispered hoarsely.

Sirius nodded. “Yes, but, I’ve realized just how much you’re hiding from me.”

Remus squeezed his eyes shut. Sirius rubbed Remus’ forehead, as if he could clear the clouds that he kept getting whenever he automatically tried to gouge his thoughts with legilimency.

“Just take down your walls. It’s not too hard, I’ve had to do it.”

Remus sighed. “What do I do? Reverse it?”

Sirius kissed his ear and whispered, “Good choice.”

Remus turned and glared at the rim of the tub. “How do I do it?”

Sirius ran a hand through Remus’ hair, rubbing his scalp. “It’s kind of like reversing it. You also have to almost imagine a mental wall coming down. Reverse, take down the wall.”

Remus closed his eyes and tried doing just that. He opened his eyes and looked at Sirius, who shook his head.

Remus sighed and tried again, Sirius noted that he was swaying a little bit.

A few minutes passed, where Remus seemed to put all the effort he had into taking down those walls.

He suddenly slumped down, onto Sirius and out cold.

Sirius looked down at him and tried to get past the occlumency. He sighed.

Well, at least the wall seemed to have softened.

He cleaned Remus and got him out of the tub, carrying him. “ _Je ne voulais pas que tu t'évanouisses._ ”

He laid Remus on the bed and dressed him and then himself. He crawled in next to him, watching him stir.

“Ugh. Did I do it?”

Sirius shook his head, then watched Remus start to try _again_. “Stop it, that’s not going to help anyone. Go to sleep, we’ll figure this out tomorrow.”

Remus nodded and turned over, away from Sirius. Sirius glared at his back, but didn’t say or do a thing. It was Remus’ choice to have to experience a drop.

Sirius went to sleep, as soon as he heard Remus’ breathing even out.

The next day, Remus woke up yet again before Sirius. However, he couldn’t move, so Sirius blinked his eyes open to Remus staring at him resentfully.

Sirius smirked, knowing why Remus was still in bed with him. “Good morning. How’d you sleep? No back pains?”

He had to rub it in, it was only natural. Remus sat up, then yelped and laid back down as Sirius laughed.

“I don’t think you’ll be leaving the bed today.”

Remus shot him a harsh glare, but stayed silent. Sirius got up, got dressed, and knelt in front of Remus on the bed, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek and smirking. “Don’t go anywhere,” he taunted.

Remus crossed his arms and glared at the ceiling. Sirius left the room, smug.

Sirius worked through the afternoon, Lyra coming in at one point, and Regulus at another. He worked on papers, had a cup of tea, then a cup of coffee, and kind of missed Remus’ presence in the chair in front of his desk.

All in all, it was kind of boring. Sirius left the room, noting that he had to leave his house the next day, that he’d probably bring Remus. He’d excuse it as always needing a servant by his side.

Many ministry officials had servants, they just acted as if it were a terrible thing. He hated having to go to an office though, at least in his own house, he had the illusion of the option to get up and do something else.

Sirius pondered this as he went back into his room, where he found Remus and Lyra, both hiding something under the covers and looking extremely guilty. Sirius raised an eyebrow at them.

“What are you two doing?”

Something moved under the blankets, Sirius looked down at it. Lyra looked down and then back up at Sirius.

“Nothing.”

Remus tried to stop whatever was under the blankets from moving. Sirius looked down at it. “Lyra, go see what your father’s doing.”

Lyra shot a fearful look towards Remus but hopped off the bed, tried to take the lump with her, but stopped when Sirius said, “ _Now_.”

She left the room, just as the moving lump let out a small meow.

Sirius looked down at it and raised his eyebrows at Remus. Remus tried to grab the blankets as Sirius pulled them off.

“Really?”

There was a little gray kitten in Remus’ lap, crawling around.

Remus picked it up and held it to his chest. “There’s a litter outside. Lyra brought this one in to introduce her to me.”

Sirius held his hand out. “Give it to me.”

Remus shook his head and twisted away as Sirius tried to grab it.

“Give it to me, now!”

Remus tried to crawl over the bed, only to fall down. Sirius crawled over him and picked up the kitten. Remus tried to make a grab for it, but Sirius moved out of the way.

He held up the kitten and looked at it. It started purring and tried to get closer, obviously liking Sirius.

Sirius smiled at the kitten before grabbing it’s neck and squeezing as hard as he could. He threw it against the wall, with a sickening crunch, and watched it slide down.

Remus was staring at the hurt kitten with a horrified and sick look on his face as it started to cry. He ran over to pick it up, to be stopped by Sirius.

“It won’t like you, you may as fell scare it to death before it dies.”

Remus dodged Sirius and fell to the ground next to the kitten. He tried to get up, but obviously couldn’t. He glared up at Sirius, who was looking down at him, smirk on his face.

“What are you going to do for it? You can’t do anything.”

Remus glared up at Sirius and got up, though shakily. He started to leave the room, but was stopped by Sirius.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?”

Remus shook off his hand and glared over his shoulder at him. “To get the cat some help. Hopefully your niece won’t see this poor thing screaming in pain and dying from something _you’ve_ done.”

Sirius grabbed Remus and pulled him close, glaring at him hard. “Is that a _threat?_ ”

Remus’ jaw set and he glared back at Sirius, answering, “You're the one who said that she’s bright. She left the cat to one person who played and got along with the cat and one who certainly looked furious at the cat.”

Sirius let Remus go, watching him limp from the room as he walked down the hall, to Regulus’ room. He walked in, and stayed in for a few minutes. He left the room, back to Sirius, and gingerly sat on the bed.

Sirius slammed the door shut, before turning back to Remus. He stood in front of him for a long moment, trying to decide what to do with him. Remus was shaking, but he was also glaring at Sirius furiously.

Sirius touched Remus’ face. “You’ll be sleeping on the floor for the next few nights. No food, no water, unless I say. I’d take you into the playroom, but I’ve noticed that it doesn’t seem to affect you anymore to be punished. You won’t be seeing anyone besides me, you will keep your head down. I’m going to tell them I returned you, you’re not going to correct me. If they see you, you’re to ignore them, no matter what. Do you understand?”

Remus nodded, his eyes on Sirius’ shoes. Sirius lifted his chin. “ _Do you understand me?_ ”

Remus’ eyes found Sirius and he said, “Yes.”

Remus jerked his chin away and tried to look to the side, but Sirius wouldn’t have it. “No, don’t you dare look away while I’m talking to you.”

Remus looked up at him. Sirius glared down at him and got in his lap again. “I think you’ve gotten a little too comfortable with me. You’re still a servant, and you’re _my_ servant. You weren’t supposed to be seen, no one was supposed to know you exist. I’m going to have to undo the past week.”

Remus bit his lip. Sirius could see him working out his plan. Get him comfortable enough to forget his place. Build him up a bit. Tear him down.

Sirius smirked. “Good. Make sure you remember that.”

“Of course.”

Sirius rolled his hips and ran his hand through Remus’ hair.

“Good, now, I think I want to test your mouth for a bit tonight, so get on you knees, on the floor.”

Remus closed his eyes as Sirius got off of him and sat on the bed.

Remus sighed and got on his knees between Sirius’ legs. Sirius smirked down at him and undid his belt.

He absolutely loved his new toy.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This shall be updated every other Wednesday, same drill as the other stories, if I miss a day, it’ll be updated the next week, if I miss that one, the one after that. Still trying to work on five stories, so please bear with me, bc I may change it around so I update my stories every weekend (ie: I may change this to every other Saturday, oneshots every other Sunday, and then the other stories on the weeks in between these updates) but I’m not sure yet.

Sirius sat in his office, watching Remus, three weeks later. He never had a plan to do that, it was just that he did that with all of the servants. Remus did as he was told, resentfully, but he did it.

No one knew he was there, Sirius wasn’t questioned when he told them that he returned Remus. He took the only other redhead servant out back and killed him so it would be easier to take Remus from place to place.

He didn’t actually want to do that, though, it was a reflex for when he got a new servant. Not to mention Remus being stupidly different with him. It didn’t matter, though, because now he had to do it.

Remus looked up, but didn’t say a word, only looking back down. Good.

“Stand.”

Remus stood up, putting his book down. “I was thinking about how you have to kill werewolves with silver.”

Remus nodded. He looked tentative, like he wanted to run. “So, what would happen if I Avada Kedavra’d you?”

Remus took a step back. “I-“

“Don’t answer me.”

Remus looked down at Sirius’ wand and ran to the office door. Sirius chased him and pressed him into the door. “What are you doing?”

“You’re going to put me in a fucking coma, I’m leaving!”

Sirius leaned back and ran a hand through Remus’ hair, letting his hand slide down and rest at his neck. He snaked his hand around Remus’ neck and pressed it into his throat.

“I can kill you.”

“That’s what I’ve been asking from you,” Remus said through gritted teeth.

Sirius smirked to himself. He knew that. “Hm. Maybe I should reconsider.”

Remus sighed shakily and closed his eyes. He knew not to speak. Sirius smirked, he didn’t want to curse Remus anymore. “Bend over the desk.”

Remus flinched. Sirius led him to the desk by his throat. Sirius waved his wand, vanishing his work, and Remus bent over the desk for him. “Good boy, knowing your place.”

Sirius pulled down his trousers and got his own cock out. “Do you think you’re still prepped enough from last night?”

Remus shook his head frantically and tried to get up, stopped by a swat to his arse. “Careful, I’ll make it hurt if you make me angry. I can check.”

Sirius smirked and spread Remus’ legs as far apart as he could get them. He moved one finger over his entrance and saw that he was still stretched enough.

“It wouldn’t hurt for me,” he murmured.

He looked at Remus, who had his face screwed up on the desk, and took some pity on him.

He wet one of his fingers and stuck it in him. He heard Remus’ sigh of relief and moan. “Good?”

Remus nodded, seemingly restraining from moving much. “Do I need to tie you down?”

Remus shook his head and Sirius added another finger. “Oh, Merlin.”

Sirius started to piston them in and out of Remus and made sure to give his prostate some sound jabs. He was only lubricating Remus, though, not stretching him, so he didn’t take long.

“Should have just licked it.”

He took out his fingers and held them in front of Remus’ mouth. Remus opened it, knowing he had no choice, Sirius thought.

He was prepped, Sirius thought as he fucked his fingers in and out of Remus’ mouth. He positioned his cock in front of Remus’ entrance and pushed in.

“Fuck.”

Remus moaned around his fingers before Sirius pulled out and flipped him over, tearing his trousers off. “Look at me.”

Remus nodded, Sirius loosely wrapped his hand around his throat. “Good.”

Sirius slammed back in just as the door opened. Remus had to look, which was a mistake. Sirius slapped Remus’ thigh, and looked down at him. He knew Remus saw who it was, he was so red.

“Wait for me, Lyall.”

Sirius squeezed Remus’ neck, pulling him back to the moment. He noticed that Remus did that sometimes.

Remus looked up at him, his eyes glassy. He let his head fall back, but still stared at Sirius. Sirius started to go harder and faster, smirking down at Remus. Remus was biting his tongue, he didn’t want to make a sound. That wouldn’t do.

He had to make Remus forget where he was.

They both heard the door open and shut again. “Do you think he’ll stay?”

Sirius adjusted his angle and watched Remus almost bite off his tongue. He found it.

“You know I don’t like when you try to be quiet. Scream for me, or I’ll punish you.”

Remus tried to cover his mouth, but Sirius caught his hands and leaned over him. His hips didn’t stop, “I said, scream.”

Remus tried to turn his head, but Sirius put his wrists in one hand and grabbed his neck again. “Scream.”

Remus sobbed and moaned, now unable to stop. Sirius wasn’t satisfied, so he went harder, finally tearing a bit of a guttural scream from him. “Fuck!”

Sirius leaned lower and pressed his lips to Remus’, giving him mercy. Remus came between them, sobbing into Sirius’ mouth. Sirius smirked, he wasn’t close to done and Remus just made a grave mistake.

Sirius picked up the pace, making Remus convulse. He held his legs open, which made Remus try to cover his mouth and his whimpers. Sirius smirked and felt himself start to twitch.

Remus was sobbing and moaning behind his hands, Sirius could tell it was more out of pain. It was fair, he was wringing Remus dry.

He slowed down and started grinding into Remus, who was barely breathing. Remus’ legs were trying to close, he loved it, loved holding him down like this. He started to speed up again, chasing his own orgasm. He had to get back to Lyall.

Remus was whimpering and whining, obviously wanting Sirius to finish. Sirius started speeding up even more. Remus was clenching and squeezing around him. Sirius angled his thrusts again, so Remus was moaning loudly again.

Sirius started making restrained noises, twitching inside of Remus. Remus was so tight and hot around his cock, he could feel him pulling Sirius’ orgasm from his cock. Sirius felt his balls draw up into him and grunted.

His thrusts got sloppier and he released into Remus, riding it out with a few more thrusts and slumping over Remus when he was done.

Remus whined and tried to push Sirius up. Sirius sighed happily, Remus was usually needier than most after sex. He loved it.

Sirius pulled himself up and looked down at Remus, satisfied. He was fucked out, Sirius loved when he looked up at him with bright and needy eyes, cheeks red and lips slightly pushed out.

“You’re going to have to be under my desk for a few minutes.”

Remus nodded and picked his arms up. Sirius picked him up and looked at him. He looked adorable. “Fuck it, put on your trousers.”

Remus sat on the ground and winced, pulling on his trousers. When they were on, he picked Remus up and sat down with him.

“I can’t—”

“Shh, ten minutes at most. Drift off a bit, I’ll give you a bath later.”

Sirius waved his wand and opened the door. “You have ten minutes.”

Remus’ hands clenched in Sirius’ jacket, he didn’t want to be here. Sirius pet his hair.

“Laws.”

Lyall glared at Remus’ back, then Sirius. Sirius smirked, daring Lyall to say a word. “Right, I’ll have a look at them. Let you know later. Is that all?”

Lyall glared at Sirius and spit out the word, “Faggot.”

Sirius only tilted Remus’ head to the side and licked up his neck. “Who will believe you?”

Lyall looked furious, but didn’t say a word. It was true. They both knew. “I was right, before. Best arse I’ve ever fucked. Very submissive.”

Lyall stood up and spit at them, which Remus flinched at.

He swept from the office and kicked the door shut. Sirius laughed and got up, only amused with this entire thing. “The servants will clean my desk.”

Remus nodded and buried his face in his neck. “You know you’re in trouble, don’t you? You’re not allowed to run, you know that.”

Remus nodded and shakily exhaled. He likely wouldn’t talk again anytime soon. Sirius walked into their room to the bathroom and put him in the bath. He waved his wand and the tub was filled with water and he was naked. Remus looked around, surprised.

Sirius washed him, making sure there would be no evidence of what they did when he was done. Sirius tilted Remus’ face up and got close to it. “You know that this is all for you, don’t you?”

Remus nodded automatically, the question not reaching his head. Sirius laughed and sat down on the floor outside the bathtub. “No, I mean it. Answer me.”

Remus looked over at Sirius. “Hmm?”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Listen to me.”

Remus turned his head and laid in the bathtub, blinking up at Sirius. “‘M listening.”

Sirius rubbed his head and watched him close his eyes, not listening again. They both knew that this would fade away in less than a day. Sirius didn’t want it to, but he had a mask to wear. He smiled at Remus while he could and poked his cheek. “You’re adorable. All of this, Moony. It’s not just for me.”

Remus tilted his head to the side. He looked adorably confused. “That doesn’t make sense.”

Sirius patted his head. “Yes, it does. Don’t you like to forget and let go?”

Remus nodded. “And don’t you like when I can take care of you?”

Remus nodded again. “Don’t you like when I don’t have to punish you?”

Remus nodded. “So how is it not for you?”

Remus shrugged, which made Sirius smile at him. Bless him, so deep in his subspace that he couldn’t even ask the right questions.

Remus was staring at Sirius. “You don’t want to hurt me?”

Sirius kissed his forehead. “I mean, sometimes. But there are other servants for those needs, which makes you lucky.”

Remus blinked at Sirius, which made Remus even more endeared to him. “See? We help each other.”

Remus smiled at Sirius and told him, “You’re full of shit. You’re just insecure.”

Sirius smiled at Remus and pointed at him. “You’re going back to the playroom if you don’t shut up.”

Remus closed his eyes again as Sirius pet him again. “You know it’s true.”

Sirius did, but it didn’t matter. “You’ve been a servant for, eh, you’re my age, so what, fifteen years? And you haven’t learned anything?”

Remus shrugged. Sirius’ hand was still in his hair. “I don’t understand. You know I can hurt you, you know I love to see it. It’s like you like it.”

Remus pushed his head into Sirius’ hand. “You’re the one who can’t stop. If I’m breathing, you don’t like it. Yet you can’t tell me or yourself why.”

Sirius glared at Remus and pushed his hand through his hair. He knew why, he just didn’t want to say. “If you want to know, things are going to change. Not for the better, for you, anyway. It’s only going to get worse, because it’s too wrong, I wasn’t supposed to ever let this get the better of me.”

Remus tilted his head to the side, now curious. “Tell me.”

Sirius sighed. “You asked for it. When I first saw you, there was a click behind my eyes. It wasn’t in my brain, not really. I wanted you so badly, I had to have you. Then, I met you, and I got a bit warmer, but I didn’t know that I did. I didn’t know that I was being nicer to you until I told you so. Then, I hugged you for the first time, got as close as I could, I honestly wanted to cry. I wanted to stay that way, it felt so nice and so warm. But I liked your fear, too, and I didn’t know what to do with that because I wanted to protect you, too. I don’t know what to do with it, because that’s not something I was ever supposed to feel. Now, I do, I don’t know what it is, I don’t want to know what it is, and it’s making me want to kill you and hug and kiss you at the same time.”

Remus stared at Sirius, wide eyed. Sirius raised an eyebrow at him and jerked his chin up to him. “You understand why I have to undo everything I just said, don’t you?”

Remus backed away, he obviously didn’t expect something that would possibly get him killed. “I-I didn’t—”

“You asked, didn’t you?”

Remus backed away, even though he was in the tub. Sirius got up and walked around the tub. Remus got in the middle and stayed there, making Sirius wave his wand. The water started to get hotter and hotter, which made Remus jump out, before it could get out. They both knew this game by now.

“Come on. You asked.”

Remus shook his head and ran the other way, so Sirius followed. “I said,” Sirius grabbed him by his hair, “Come on. Have you already forgotten your place?”

Remus cried out and tried to get away. Sirius sighed in annoyance and grabbed his wrist. He yanked him from the bathroom and threw him onto the bed. “Do you enjoy this?”

Remus shook his head and backed away. Sirius crawled onto the bed and put his hand over his throat. “Then why are you so difficult? I’ve been being as patient as I could with you, but you make me want to really hurt you, make you regret being born more than you already do. I’d never kill you, even though you’re the most worthless servant I’ve ever met.”

Remus took a shaky breath and backed away a little more. He wasn’t going to talk, Sirius thought. “What do I have to do to remind you of your place?”

Remus muttered something under his breath, Sirius glared at him.

“Say that out loud.”

Remus glared at Sirius. “I did.”

Sirius grabbed Remus’ face and hit him, hard enough to make him cry out. “Let me hear it.”

Remus grabbed his face and glared at Sirius. “You’re the only one who forgets my place, I’ve gotten all the confirmation I need.”

Sirius glowered at Remus darkly and got his wand out. “How dare you? I should cut out your tongue.”

Remus set his jaw and crossed his arms. If Sirius couldn’t see his jaw and cheeks twitching, he’d have thought he wasn’t scared.

“Okay. Fine.”

Sirius dragged Remus up by his hair to the middle of the room and got out a knife. He waved his wand, forcing Remus’ tongue from his mouth and keeping it there. Remus looked terrified, which was perfect.

Sirius smirked, “You know, I rather like your tongue. If you can be good, I’ll heal you in after a while.”

Remus squeezed his eyes shut as Sirius pressed the knife to his tongue. As it slid into the muscle, he almost bit it. Sirius smirked and started to cut it off. The knife slid to the other side of his tongue, easily enough, and he ripped the knife through the next.

Remus, who was barely concealing his whimpers and whines, screamed. Sirius covered his mouth and looked down at him.

“Shut it. I did this to shut you up, if you’re good, I’ll give it back. But, until then, I’ll make you choke to death on your own blood if you don’t shut up.”

Remus nodded and tried to quiet down. He tried to bite down on his tongue out of habit and cried out. Sirius smirked and got the trash bin. “Spit your blood in here.”

Remus got on the floor and spit out the blood, his face going pale. He tried to keep his mouth open and couldn’t stop making pained noises.

Sirius sighed and silencio’d him. He got on the floor next to him and watched Remus try to stop the bleeding somehow. He was crying, Sirius watched him bleed out for a bit.

“Do you want me to stop the bleeding?”

Remus nodded and flinched as Sirius sat down next to him. “Should I, though?”

Remus didn’t answer, waiting for Sirius to do something, it seemed. Remus looked at him and saw his wand was pointed at him.

“Better,” Sirius asked as Remus’ face flooded with relief.

Remus nodded and slumped forward.

“You’re not done. That was for your cheek, I didn’t even get to your original punishment.”

Remus squeezed his eyes shut again. Sirius picked him up and carried him to the bed.

“But what should I do? Your punishments don’t seem to be affecting you. No matter what I do to you, it only spurs you to get worse.”

Remus watched Sirius pace around the room, then stop, smirking.

“Come here.”

Remus stood up and walked towards Sirius. Sirius put his hand up when Remus was a few feet from him and walked to a cabinet, pulling out a shallow stone basin that Remus recognized from books.

He backed away, but Sirius grabbed his arm and pulled him to the bed. He summoned a table and pressed his lips to Remus’ neck. “I should get you so vulnerable that you can barely think straight before I do this. That’d make it worse.”

Remus made a noise in his throat but didn’t try to say a word. “You’re lucky I’m not that cruel.”

Remus glared at the wall opposite him at that, unable to say a word. Sirius smirked and pressed a kiss to his jaw. His wand came up to Remus’ head and started to extract his memories. He kept his lips to Remus’ neck, his other hand holding him down.

“I didn’t even think about this kind of pain for you. Imagine what I could have done.”

Remus tried to get up, but Sirius wouldn’t let him. Sirius added the last memory to the pensieve, unbelieving of what he was about to do.

This was crossing a line that he couldn’t turn back from, it was unclear whether it was good or bad, though.

Sirius looked at Remus and saw that he looked like he was facing the guillotine. Sirius smirked and pushed his face into the pensieve before following him.

He landed next to Remus, who was staring at the scene, wide eyed. It was the night that he’d been bitten.

Sirius grabbed his arm as he tried to leave the room. “Don’t you dare.”

Remus shook his head and tried to run again. Sirius waved his hand and Remus couldn’t move. His feet were glued to the ground.

“Stay and watch.”

Remus looked at Sirius, who was watching the scene unfold. They were at the part where Greyback came in through the window. Remus shut his eyes. Sirius looked over and saw, so he snapped his fingers again and forced his eyes open.

“Last warning.”

Remus tried to shake his head, but watched as his four year old self was tucked in. Sirius smirked at the unscarred, happy, and smiling little boy, so woefully unaware of his fate.

Present Remus was staring at himself, too. Sirius walked around him and looked at his face. He covered his face, not wanting to see. Sirius took his hands down.

The little Remus got up and looked under the bed. Remus tried to turn his head away, to have it pushed forward by Sirius, as he screamed and was attacked. He was bitten.

Remus made a noise, his eyes filling with tears, as his younger counterpart screamed. Hope ran in, only for Fenrir to turn to her and smile.

Sirius let go of his head, so Remus turned his head away. Sirius watched it, and it honestly looked as if her face was clawed off. She couldn’t even scream. More screaming.

Sirius watched Lyall walk in as Fenrir jumped from the window. He snapped his fingers and the memories changed. He only looked for the memories that Remus thought of as his worst. Sirius didn’t expect to see something completely different.

Remus stared at the floor as almost a montage of years and years of Lyall treating Remus as something less than human, less than even dog. Sirius blinked as he saw a day at Hogwarts, where Remus was cursed by some bigger Slytherins for being in Gryffindor, a relatively normal event.

Then, him coming home. Remus talking to Lyall about how he was going to learn everything, how he was going to make their lives better, Lyall’s white grip on the steering wheel.

They pulled over, Remus looked around, confused. “Where are we?”

Lyall got out of the car, which made Remus get out, too. Remus closed his door, Sirius saw Lyall get back in and speed away.

Present Remus was panting and wheezing. He was having a panic attack as his younger self cried and screamed. Sirius looked at him and watched Folgens come take him. He shouldn’t have done this.

He really shouldn’t have done this. This was a mistake.

Just one more, for Sirius to see. He snapped his fingers and watched him get whipped. Remus was a tiny child, so most of his body was covered in the wounds.

Sirius snapped his fingers one last time and got them out. Remus fell back against the bed and stared blankly at the wall.

“Re—”

Remus made a noise, almost like words but not really, and ran to the other side of the room. He couldn’t leave, Sirius saw he wouldn’t. He walked towards him, but Remus picked up a nearby lamp and threw it at him.

Sirius dodged it and raised an eyebrow at Remus, annoyed. He understood, but he couldn’t show it if Remus was going to continue to act like this.

Remus curled up in the corner and didn’t move, but when Sirius shifted, he threw the closest thing at him.

“I’m glad you’ve finally registered the severity of your current situation.”

Remus raised his eyes to Sirius’ and looked back down. Sirius could tell the scenes he’d relived were still flashing behind his eyes. Sirius tried to take another step forward, only to have the wardrobe tipped over in front of him.

Remus flinched as it smashed, but Sirius realized the severity of what he’d done. Sirius watched Remus take one of the splinters of wood and hold it to his chest.

Fuck, he’d broken his new toy after a month.

“You’re worthless.”

Sirius turned and swept from the room, not knowing what else to do. He’d messed up, so badly.

He called for a Ministry car and went back to his room. He needed to figure this out. He looked in at Remus, then saw that he wasn’t there.

He looked around, trying to figure out where he could have gone. While he did so, he fixed the wardrobe.

He had to figure out a better course of action.

He couldn’t have gone far, Sirius was gone for less than three minutes. He checked the window.

“Hi.”

Remus flinched and looked at Sirius, who pet his hair, even as he trembled. “I didn’t say you could move.”

Sirius smirked, Remus looked petrified. “We’re going for a drive. No need to look at me like that, I can’t return you. Don’t you remember? I’m just... taking you out.”

Remus nodded, still terrified. Sirius noticed that he was still naked. “Come here, let’s get you some clothes.”

Remus shakily stood up and almost fell back down. Sirius knew why, he just didn’t say a thing.

“I told you so.”

Sirius studied Remus, wondering if he’d get a flash of the defiance from before. He didn’t.

Sirius wanted this, didn’t he?

“Come on. I called for a car in front of the Ministry, so we’ll be in London.”

Sirius smirked as Remus stiffened up, terrified. He held up a dark purple shirt to Remus, then a black one. “I like you in black. Is that weird?”

Remus shook his head and put the shirt on with no complaints. Sirius handed him some trousers and watched him put them on. “Maybe we’ll stop for a bit. Well, maybe not. We can shield the back of the car from the driver and fuck in the back seat.”

Remus looked at Sirius’ chest and waited for further instruction. Sirius realized that he wasn’t going to talk. “Come on. Let’s go.”

Remus followed Sirius, a few steps behind him. Sirius noticed, he used to walk with him out of pure defiance.

Sirius grabbed his arm and pulled him to his side. “Walk with me,” he told him, annoyed.

Remus nodded and kept his head down, Sirius could tell he didn’t want to anger him anymore.

Sirius grabbed Remus’ arm and apparated from the house. Remus fell into him, so he was probably weak. Sirius supported him and opened the car door for him.

Remus got in and scooted over for Sirius. Sirius got in, too, closing the door, and leaned forward to whisper in the drivers ear where to go.

He leaned back and smirked at Remus. Remus was still trembling. He never stopped. “Get close to me.”

Remus leaned closer to Sirius. Sirius pulled him into his side and held him firmly there.

“How are you?”

Remus closed his eyes and shook his head. “I’m sorry,” he whispered in a strangled voice.

Sirius looked down at him. His lack of a tongue slurred his words a bit, but his statement didn’t use his tongue.

Sirius looked at him and pulled him into his lap. “I don’t know why it’s so bad.”

“Because you ma’e i’ ba’.”

Sirius pointed his wand at the screen between the driver and the backseat. It went black. “Shh. I have to defend myself.”

Remus got off of Sirius’ lap. “I didn’t say you could do that. You know I want to take care of you.”

“I ‘ont! You o’ly ‘ell me ‘at you have ‘o pu’ish me! I ‘in’ ‘o a’y’ing! I ‘o’ ‘eserve ‘is!”

Remus got on the other side of the car and curled up away from him. Sirius got closer. “I told you.”

“A’d why ca’t you jus’ ac’ o’ i’!?”

Remus froze. So did Sirius. “And what do you mean by that, Moony?”

Sirius got closer. Remus scooted away, towards the door. Sirius crowded into him and touched his cheek from behind. “You asked me why I can’t just act on it. What do you mean, Moony?”

Remus shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut. “I ‘i’n’ mea’ i’.”

Sirius moved away quickly. He wouldn’t get anything from Remus, not right now. “I should, shouldn’t I?”

Remus hunched over again and nodded the slightest bit, probably thinking Sirius wouldn’t see it. He didn’t know what Remus was playing at, he didn’t know if he could trust it.

“Let’s try taking down your occlumency again.”

Remus shook his head. “I ‘o’ i’k I ‘a’.”

“I can’t understand that.”

Remus sighed and looked around the car. It seemed to pass his test, because he waved his hand and summoned a pencil and some parchment. He tried to write on it and made a noise, summoning a pen. He wrote out his message.

“You don’t think you can?”

Remus nodded. Sirius looked at him for a long minute and got closer to him. “You made progress last time.”

Remus closed his eyes and nodded. He may as well. He screwed his face shut and tried to stop using occlumency. Sirius waved his wand and tried to help. He tried to get through and finally did.

“Ugh! Finally!”

Remus looked up at Sirius and tilted his head. He backed away and back into the door.

Sirius gave him a confused look and got closer.

“O’ come a’y c’oser, p’ease!”

Sirius watched Remus press himself into the door and fumble for the handle. “Hey, hey!”

Remus pressed himself into the door and whimpered, tears escaping his eyes. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry!”

Sirius got closer and ran a hand through Remus’ hair. “Hey,” he told him, gentler.

Remus looked up at him, teary eyed and very obviously scared. “When did you learn occulmency?”

Remus was trembling, his eyes had slid shut. “Ir’ee’.”

Sirius rubbed his hair. “Thirteen?”

Remus nodded. Sirius turned it over in his mind. Remus was still whimpering. “Could you have found a way to block out fear?”

Remus shrugged. He was watching Sirius carefully, gasping with every movement.

“But you’ve been scared of me.”

This was different, though, wasn’t it? It was more of a submissive fear, not defiant.

Remus nodded. Sirius got closer. “Look at me.”

Remus’ eyes found Sirius’. Sirius carefully pet his cheek. “Don’t put up the whole wall again, but block out your fear, can you do that?”

Remus shrugged and closed his eyes before opening them again, making sure that Sirius was where he was before. Sirius got closer and tilted Remus’ head to the side, pressing his lips to his jaw. “You can do that for me, can’t you, puppy?”

Remus shook with restraining himself, Sirius smirked. He was holding back a lot more than fear. “I’d love to reward you for doing a good job. Wouldn’t you like that?”

Remus nodded and closed his eyes. Sirius stayed where he was, he knew Remus wouldn’t be able to do anything if he moved. He stayed like that until Remus sighed in relief.

Sirius lifted his head and smirked. He could still get past Remus’ occlumency. “I knew you were scared. That would explain a lot.”

Remus turned to the window again. “‘I’ ‘ow.”

Sirius got closer and wrapped his arms around Remus from behind. “Of course you didn’t, not if you started using it when you were thirteen. There’s probably an explanation somewhere, if you want to look for it.”

Remus sighed and turned back around. He buckled his seatbelt.

“I’s ‘a’ge’ous ‘o ri’e wi’ou’ a sea’bel’.”

Sirius rolled his eyes and got closer to Remus. “I’m sure we’ll be fine.”

Remus shrugged and noticed the car was slowing down. He looked out the window, they were at a park.

“Why are we—”

Sirius simply grabbed Remus’ hand and pulled him from the car. He brought Remus to a rock and sat him down.

“I only brought you here to think, so stay there.”

Remus watched Sirius pace, head cocked a bit to the side. He startled forward a bit when Sirius got too far, ready to run. Finally, Sirius walked back, sitting on the rock with Remus.

He had to fix this. He wanted Remus, more than anything. But he also wanted to be with Remus. He wanted to cuddle with him and not want to hurt him afterwards. Not unless he wanted it.

“How do you feel about me?”

Remus looked up at Sirius, who was staring at him as intensely as he could. He wanted the truth.

Remus shrugged.

Sirius tilted his face up and looked into his eyes. He could see Remus jolt a little, but could also see himself through Remus’ eyes.

Remus was usually terrified, that would have to be fixed if he could do what he wanted. Remus was also staring at him a lot more often than he thought. Remus thought he was fit. That’s a start.

He really liked the aftercare and the occasional forced cuddling. That would explain his lack of a fight. Sirius sifted through his mixed feelings and his confusion, sorting out his own. Finally, he withdrew.

“Would you be willing to try... that with me?”

Remus raised an eyebrow at Sirius. “‘e ‘or’ure, ‘e mixe’ fee’i’gs, or t’e sex?”

Sirius put his legs up on the rock and touched Remus’ face. “Please?”

Remus stared at Sirius for a long second, long enough that Sirius thought he’d just made a big mistake and resolved to fix it.

“Wha’ ‘e fuck? You jus’ cu’ ou’ my ‘ou’gue, you sai’ ‘at you have ‘o be worse, you’re ‘ooking a’ me ‘ike I’m scum righ’ ‘ow.”

Sirius blinked. “It’s my resting face. I want to know if you want to try. And you have every right to be wary. But would you be willing to try?”

Remus looked up at Sirius, a guarded look on his face. “How ‘o I ‘ow you’re bei’g ‘e’ui’e, ‘at ‘is is’t a’o’er ‘rick?”

Sirius got closer. “How do I know you haven’t planned all of this to escape? There are different forms of occlumency.”

Remus sighed and looked steadily at Sirius. Sirius held his gaze and leaned in. “I just want to try. Just to try, I’d want to know that I tried.”

Remus sighed and closed his eyes. “Yeah, fine. O’ly because you’re beggi’g.”

Sirius smirked, knowing that wasn’t the case. “Okay. Okay.”

He leaned forward and pulled Remus into his arms. “Okay.”

Remus relaxed and cracked a small smile. “Okay,” he whispered.

Sirius held him close, feeling the telltale click that meant that they were together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was everywhere. I’m sorry.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know how anticlimactic this is, the more I read it. But, this was always planned for the story, so I hope you like it! 💜

It was a few weeks after Sirius’ proposal and he knew that nothing had changed.

For one, Remus was strapped to the table in the playroom again, his insides barely connected to his stomach, the cuts burned. He was beat up, cut up, and completely burned up. For another, he was trying to break it off.

Sirius was being a lot worse. He wasn’t supposed to be worse.

“Let me go! I don’t want this anymore! You-you s—”

“Shut up. I didn’t say to speak.”

Sirius covered his mouth and felt more tears hit his hand, wondering if he should sew Remus’ mouth shut. “I’m just having some fun with you.”

Remus closed his eyes and kept them closed, not wanting to look at Sirius anymore, it seemed. Maybe he was trying to will himself to die.

Sirius ran his hands down Remus’ waist, wondering if he should stop as he traced a knife along Remus’ innards, making him sob.

The obvious answer was yes. He did say he would, Remus was on the edge of telling Sirius he was done. Sirius could force Remus not to ‘break up’ with him, but it meant nothing if he did.

Sirius sighed and undid the straps around Remus’ wrists and ankles. “You're not done.”

Remus closed his eyes and Sirius helped him up. “I mean not with me. Here, we’re done.”

He helped Remus from the room, into the closet, and sat him down there. It looked like a murder scene, Remus was shaking.

“You’re such a good boy, did you know that?”

Sirius tried to come forward to start to heal Remus, but Remus moved back, groaning. Sirius tried to approach Remus again, but Remus’ hand went to the wound and he started trying to tear at it.

Sirius rushed forward and shouted, “What are you doing!?”

Remus felt his hands forced up, not knowing if he was actually strong enough to fight. He wasn’t, Sirius didn’t even know he was fighting.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Remus closed his eyes again, blood was still pouring from his stomach. “I-I’ve been begging y-you to k-kill me since I got here. I-if you won’t, I-I’ll do i-it myself.”

Sirius sighed and moved Remus’ hand from his stomach. “No, you’re not. I don’t want you dead.”

Remus’ breath was shaking and he tried to move his hands again. It only came out as a twitch.

Sirius carried him to their bed and undressed him. Remus was almost completely knocked out, moaning in pain, but limp and completely still.

“It was just some fun.”

He saw Remus shake his head and looked down at the biggest wound. It honestly looked disgusting and painful.

He ended up having to force feed Remus a blood replenishing potion. Now, came another fun part.

Sirius swiped his hands through the blood on Remus’ stomach and spread his legs. When Remus tried to shift away, he roughly pulled him closer, making Remus let out a pitiful sound.

“Hold still.”

Remus closed his eyes and Sirius’ bloody finger circled his entrance. He felt it go in, stickily and almost painfully.

Sirius swiped more blood from Remus’ stomach. Remus felt sick, he turned onto his side and was yanked back onto his back.

Sirius added another finger, making Remus cry out. “Give me permission.”

Remus closed his eyes. Sirius always demanded permission, seemingly to make himself feel better.

“Just do it,” he whispered.

Sirius smiled widely and added a third finger. “Look at it.”

Remus shook his head. “I-I’m already sick.”

Sirius reached up and yanked Remus’ head down, forcing him to look.

It looked like Sirius had impaled Remus with a knife, or like his fingers were knives. Remus stared down at his fingers and screamed, trying to move away.

“It-it- stop! Stop, stop, you fucking— stop!”

Sirius withdrew his fingers and licked them, making Remus gag. Remus fell off of the bed and threw up, Sirius still hadn’t healed him, so he screamed as he did so.

Sirius picked him up and kissed his nose and forehead. Remus looked away and almost tried to get out of Sirius’ arms.

He couldn’t let himself fall, though.

“I’ll heal it, let’s get you cleaned up.”

Remus bit his lip, his eyes filled with tears. “You got worse.”

Sirius closed his eyes as he dropped Remus onto the floor. Sirius got a sewing kit and some liquid bandage.

“That… that hurts, I don’t want it.”

Sirius looked down at the liquid bandage, brow furrowed. “You need it.”

Remus closed his eyes as Sirius started working on him, dumping the organs hanging out back in, closing the wound, and starting the sew it shut. Remus closed his eyes, trying not to make much noise.

Sirius got done, putting the needle away and cutting and tying the thread. He carefully spread some liquid bandage over the burnt cut. Remus jolted and whimpered.

“Fuck!”

Sirius picked him up and put him in the bath. “Yes, fuck.”

Remus sat up, Sirius started cleaning him, cleaning his arse hole first, then everything else. The water was dark brown, tinged with reddish-pink when he was done.

“You’ve only gotten worse,” Remus repeated.

“If you say that again, I’m going to have to reprimand you.”

Remus closed his eyes. “You _did_. You promised you would get better, begged me to say yes, but nothing changed.”

Sirius slammed the sponge down and glared at Remus. “Just give me time.”

“You’ve had all the time in the world! You aren’t even trying!”

Sirius glared at Remus and picked him up, wrapping him in a towel and helping him back to bed.

Once Remus was laid down and tucked in, Sirius waved his wand at the window, opening it.

“Wh—”

“I told you, I’d have to reprimand you, I’m keeping you in line. That’s it, I can’t do anything else.”

“Y-you’re proving my point!”

Sirius shrugged and left the room, giving Remus one last glare over his shoulder before he closed the door.

Remus stared at the window, the curtains flowing from the wind, the night sky outside, moon waning. The Sirius star was right in his view, it seemed to be mocking him with its twinkle.

He untucked himself and slowly got out of bed. He walked to the window and looked down over the grounds to the house. He tried to close the window, but his hand was burned as he touched it, the skin blistering.

He clenched his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut as the burn set in. He tried not to cry out as his skin bubbled. He walked back to the bed and stared at his spot.

It was the same, down to where the window was placed to him in the bed.

He took a pillow, the quilt at the end of the bed, and crawled under the bed, settling in a small nest there.

Sirius could suck his fucking arse.

—

Remus woke up later with Sirius laying at his side. In the bed. He looked at the window and saw it was closed.

He turned away, which made Sirius pull him back. “I didn’t mean it.”

Remus was silent. Sirius continued. “It’s just a need of mine. I don’t do it to anyone else.”

Remus was silently fuming, but he didn’t reply. Sirius got closer, running his hands up and down his waist again. “Come on, turn around.”

Remus did, only because he wouldn’t be given a choice. Sirius held his arms open.

“You weren’t supposed to get out of bed. You scared me.”

Remus shook his head. “Fuck you.”

Sirius just shrugged and said, “I like it the other way.”

Remus tried to get up, but Sirius held him down. “Come on, don’t be difficult.”

Remus stilled. “I don’t want this anymore. You proved you’re not capable of loving someone else, your trying only made it worse!”

Sirius shifted, holding Remus in a way that made him unable to move. “Yes, but you don’t have a choice. I own you.”

That seemed to be Remus’ breaking point, which was impressive, after everything.

He yanked himself away and flipped over, attacking Sirius. Sirius raised his hands in defense, but Remus grabbed them and just started punching him.

As each hit landed, it gave Remus a better sense of satisfaction, he started shouting, “How the hell do _you_ like it? How does it make _you_ feel!?”

He didn’t stop until Sirius pointed his wand at him, barely able to get to it.

“Enough.”

Remus glared at him, then his wand. “ _It's just for fun, I can’t help myself,_ ” he hissed, tears in his eyes.

Sirius rolled his eyes, which was the wrong move. Remus started shooting fire at him, it wasn’t too effective because of the wards, but when some of it caught on Sirius’ jacket, all hell broke loose.

It spread quickly, to the point where Sirius ran into the bathroom, turning on the shower. Remus glared at the shower head before he could get in, making the water freeze.

Sirius was shouting now, he frantically waved his hand at the water and made it unfreeze, jumping in, though it was scalding. 

Remus was pleased to see that Sirius’ hair was burned and the fire reached his skin. Sirius got out, shaking with rage. Remus glared back, not realizing when Regulus walked in.

Sirius did, though. He watched him take in Sirius’ state, and then Remus’.

He sighed and walked up behind Remus. He carefully placed his hand on his shoulder and muttered something in his ear. Remus glared at Sirius one final time and turned around, storming from the room. Sirius’ hand came up to close the door on him, but Regulus deflected it.

“I take it, didn't it work?”

Sirius huffed and sat down. “No! He doesn’t want anything to do with me!”

“Hm, I wonder why.”

“Shut up! He shouldn’t be— I’m trying and he won’t see it!”

Regulus rolled his eyes. “You keep us up with his screams. You’re not trying, you’re telling yourself you are.”

Sirius fell back into the bed, angry. “Bring him back in.”

“No. Unless you can confidently promise he won’t have a single new injury when I come back.”

Regulus raised an eyebrow as Sirius stood up. “You’re not his owner. I am.”

Regulus stared into Sirius’ dark face and replied slowly, “You're going to kill him or make him kill himself.”

Sirius suddenly stopped dead. “Fuck!”

He ran from the room, down to Regulus’ room. Remus wasn’t there.

He went down to the kitchens, checked all the windows, and raced to the roof.

Regulus was chasing him, before he asked, “What’s wrong!?”

Sirius shook his hand off and kept running to the roof. “He only said today that he wanted to kill himself, come on!”

Remus was on the roof, looking down at the ground below. Sirius almost ran at him, but Regulus grabbed his arm. “Carefully,” he whispered, “he doesn’t know we’re here.”

Sirius noticed that he didn’t. Remus was taking calming breaths, making weird noises. He didn’t want to die.

Sirius tiptoed forward, trying not to startle Remus. Remus was closing his eyes, about to step off.

Sirius was only halfway there, he wouldn’t make it, he was panicking. He got out his wand, but Regulus stopped him.

“Let him fall and catch him.”

Sirius nodded, shaking and completely panicking. Remus stepped off, Sirius was disturbed by the fact that he didn’t scream.

Sirius levitated him back up as soon as he reached the edge. He pulled Remus back up the rest of the way by hand and pulled him into his chest.

“Y-you can’t, no, nononononono! You can’t—”

Remus didn’t react, he was whimpering and biting his lip.

He grunted and squeezed Remus to his chest. “FUCK!”

Remus jumped and it seemed like he came to himself. He tried to get out of Sirius’ arms, but Sirius wouldn’t let it happen.

“Stop.”

Remus stopped. Sirius noticed he was shaking from adrenaline. “Let go.”

“Hell, no.”

Remus tried to twist away, so Sirius _stupefied_ him.

He picked Remus up and walked him back in. “We need protection on the roof, something like the gnome. I want it tested.”

Sirius walked Remus into his room and laid him down. He waved his wand at the windows and they were magically locked.

He crawled into bed with Remus and laid next to him. He wouldn’t leave him alone. 

He could finally see just how bad it was.

—

Remus stirred a few hours later, yawning and moving closer to Sirius.

He jolted back and started kicking and punching. Sirius got on top of him and laid his weight down. “Stop, stop!”

Remus stopped, glaring up at Sirius. “I shouldn’t have waited.”

Sirius shrugged. “Maybe, I’m glad you didn’t.”

Remus tried to get up, but Sirius leaned over him even more. “Sit still.”

Remus had no choice, so he did, panting. Sirius straightened up.

“I… realize that it was wrong.”

Remus gave him a truly black look but didn’t speak. Sirius was relieved by that. “I’m sorry. I want to actually try this, no… torture. Okay?”

Remus immediately snarled, “That is the same speech you gave me before, you didn’t change!”

Sirius watched Remus’ eyes close and some tears slip from them. “I _want_ to! I’m trying!”

Remus glared up at him, before hissing, “You can’t, just kill me, I’d welcome you taking me back!”

Sirius bit the inside of his cheek and closed his eyes. “Give me time?”

“You had weeks!”

Sirius sighed and rolled off of Remus. “Actual time. I won’t touch you outside of intimacy, nothing else. I promise.”

Remus glowered at him suspiciously and jerkily nodded. “Not at all, nothing, onl-only in bed, nothing sexual.”

Sirius bit his lip and said, “Fine, only cuddles and hugs, _kisses, too_. I’ll be nice.”

Remus shuffled back. “I-I want you to stop. Completely.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. He knew what Remus was getting at and didn’t like it at all.

“No. That’s final.”

Remus scowled. “Then I don’t want to, I will end up on that table again.”

Sirius shook his head. “You won’t.”

“I will.”

Sirius stopped for a minute before he was hit with an idea. “You’re not allowed out of here, I promise I’ll figure it out. I don’t want you out of sight of the door. Get a book, nothing else.”

Remus glared at him and did it, not able to do anything. Sirius walked back in and pressed a kiss to Remus’ lips. “I don’t want you unhappy.”

“I don’t believe you.”

Sirius gave him another kiss and left the room. He could just hear Remus’ frustrated scream.

He’d figure it out.

—

Remus put down his book, glaring up at Sirius when he walked in.

Sirius immediately noticed that the curtain had fallen. He waved his wand at it and watched it mend itself.

“You didn’t think I’d leave them unblocked, did you?”

Remus shrugged and turned back to his book. Sirius watched him for a second and then walked to the bed. Remus scooted away.

“You said it was okay.”

Remus looked up and glared at Sirius. “You didn’t say you’d stop.”

Sirius rolled his eyes and threw a book in front of him. Remus looked down before his eyes flew back up. “What makes you think I’d be okay with this?”

Sirius had thrown a book on BDSM in front of Remus. Sirius sat on the bed and scooted towards Remus. Remus scooted away.

“Okay, think about it. It can be… pleasurable for both sides, as long as we know what you can handle. I’m guessing no blood play?”

“I-I don’t want—”

“Just listen, okay? You already enjoy certain parts of it. You like being called ‘good boy’ and when I hold you down. You like my threatening to tie you down. You’re getting hard.”

Remus sighed and pulled a pillow into his lap. He was studying some of the pictures, his cheeks were a bit red.

“I don’t think it’s… what if you go too far?”

Sirius flipped to a later page. “Safe words.”

Sirius flipped to another page, showing Remus another scene. “That looks fun.”

Remus stared at the sub’s face, screwed up in both pleasure and pain as they were fisted. “You’re sure that they’re enjoying that?”

Sirius nodded. “It says at the beginning that they both like it. It gives me control and it gives you… what almost a way to let go? You need that.”

Remus bit his lip then tilted his head to the side at the book. “You realise I have to deal with this all the damn time already, right? Why would I want to incorporate it into sex?”

Sirius moved closer and answered, “I’m glad you asked. You’re technically the one in control, you’re safe when you do it like this. If you don’t like it or think that you’re unsafe, you can stop it. Otherwise, I stop it when I think we’re both ready.”

Remus tilted his head to the other side and said, “I don’t trust you.”

Sirius bit his lip, masking how much that hurt. “That’s fair. We won’t do it yet, we’ll build trust. You can choose how long, I just think we should try.”

Remus glared at the book. “You said that to me before.”

Sirius got closer to him and carefully wrapped his arms around him, laying his head on his shoulder. Remus wasn’t going to be sold unless Sirius tore himself open for him, which was fair.

“Why would I try so hard if I just wanted to torture you? I can do that anyway. I honestly care about you.”

Remus tensed and slowly slid Sirius’ arms off his shoulders. “No, you don’t. It’s because you want compliance.”

Sirius laughed, ignoring Remus’ blatant denial, and replied, “That would only work if I actually wanted compliance. Has it ever dawned on you that I like the struggle? If you were compliant, I wouldn’t be in control. I like breaking you down, I also like putting together the pieces.”

“But _why?_ ”

Sirius pet his head and laid his head on his stomach. “It’s all about control. I want it in everything.”

Remus groaned and looked down at him. “I don’t want to have sex with you for a long time.”

Sirius nodded. “Not until you’re comfortable.”

Remus nodded, too. “Don’t touch me.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow, which made Remus backtrack a little bit. “Ou-outside of this room.”

Sirius crawled up Remus’ body and kissed him. He noticed his eyes were wide open and sighed. “Fine. We start small. I won’t touch you outside of bed when I can’t help it. When you’re ready, we’ll see if we can move up.”

Remus nodded, still looking grim.

—

Sirius kept his promise. He crawled into bed that night and positioned himself away from Remus, despite not wanting to. Remus was still wide awake, staring at the ceiling.

“Is there something wrong?”

Remus shrugged. He didn’t move, besides that, though.

“Why aren’t you asleep, it’s four am.”

Remus turned away, making Sirius huff. He was angry, wanted to force Remus to talk, but he closed his eyes and turned away, too.

He felt Remus slowly shift toward him, trying to be discreet. Sirius turned, eyebrows raised.

“What are you doing?”

Remus froze. Sirius slowly opened his arms and Remus stared at him. It took a few seconds, but he moved into Sirius’ arms.

Remus closed his eyes and sighed. “This means nothing.”

Sirius acted like he wasn’t hurt by that. “Sure. Good night, I love you.”

Remus tensed, but stayed where he was. Sirius didn’t hear him reply, outside of shuffling closer.

It was a win.

—

As the weeks passed, Remus got less and less cold, though he still didn’t want to be touched. Sirius was able to cuddle him and kiss him, but only in their room. Remus seemed to feel safer there, which Sirius could understand. He made a point to ask Remus if he could do what he wanted to, every time.

After a week, Remus bumped hands with him outside of the room. At first, Sirius wondered if it was a mistake, but Remus did it twice after, so he bumped back. Remus finally sighed, frustrated, and held his hand.

After two weeks, Sirius took a chance and hugged Remus, right outside their room. Remus tensed, at first, but then he slowly hugged back, relaxing.

The third week, Sirius kissed Remus’ hair, right beyond the doorway to his office. Remus smiled at it, walking back to their room with a small smile on his face.

The fourth week, Sirius took the biggest chance he had yet, only caring about making Remus as comfortable as possible. He knew that this gave Remus a lot more power, the power to leave, but he wanted to.

Sirius was dragging Remus to his office, looking like an excited puppy a few weeks later. He dropped Remus’ hand as he flinched a bit.

“Come on, I have a surprise! Come on!”

Remus sighed and picked up his pace, making Sirius huff at how slow it was. He grabbed his hand and pulled him forward, running, at this point. 

“Come _on!_ ”

They were at the front door of the office. “Okay, don’t freak out.”

Remus nodded and Sirius opened the door and went straight to the entrance of the playroom.

Remus stepped back as Sirius opened it. His smile over his shoulder looked more menacing than excited.

Remus backed away, to the door of the office. Sirius ran after him and pulled him back. Remus jerked back, to the door.

“You promised, you said you wouldn’t! I agreed to _everything!_ ”

Sirius slowly let go of him, letting him run frantically forward, out of the room. He figured it was smart, as Remus had screamed. He never screamed, outside of pain and sex.

“It’s not that! I just want—”

“You _promised!_ ”

Sirius picked Remus up, making him calm down, though not in a good way, more in a resigned way, and try to say again, “You promised.”

“I’m not doing that. I’m just showing you something.”

They were at the door and Sirius opened it again, making him flinch at the metallic creak.

He carefully set Remus down and closed the door behind him. “Just look.”

Remus picked up his head, looking around, expecting the familiar bloody room, somewhat moist and covered in instruments. Sirius was proud as a shocked look crossed his face as he looked around.

The room was clean, again, practically brand new. Sirius had slaved away in it for hours and hours the night before, gotten rid of all the weapons. All of his precious knives and thumbscrews.

Remus almost fell back, Sirius caught him. “Okay? It’s clean, I don’t like cleaning, I was the one who cleaned in here. I take you in here three times every day, so you can see. It took me next to ten hours.”

Remus nodded and turned so he was facing Sirius’ chest. “You mean it?”

Sirius nodded, patting his head. “The only condition is that you try.”

Remus nodded and Sirius smiled into his hair. “Okay, next surprise.”

“Next?”

Sirius nodded and pulled Remus into his closet.

“You’d agree that there’s a bit of a… dynamic between us that’s unfair?”

Remus nodded, confused. “You bought me from the market, of course there’s an unfair dynamic.”

Sirius stepped closer and grinned. “So you agree that a relationship wouldn’t work with our current dynamic?”

Remus nodded. Sirius took out four leaves of parchment, all contracts.

“One, this is the original contract. You have a knack for pyrokinetics. Would you like the honors?”

Remus raised his hand and an eyebrow. Sirius nodded.

He set it on fire.

Sirius dropped the contract and they both watched it burn, when it was done, he kicked around the ashes a bit.

“Next, the one that I signed for your wand.”

Remus raised his hand again, a bit confused. However, Sirius held his hand up and did it himself, noticing that Remus looked excited.

Sirius handed him a letter. “Your citizenship in Wizarding France, Britain, and Ireland, because Ireland’s where Lyall Lupin came from, at least.”

Remus took it, looking over it disbelievingly.

“And lastly, I got you a job, working with me. I asked for a coworker and said I know someone who’d be perfect. This gives you so much power, I swear. What happens is, people will vote on laws, then we pass them completely. Say… there’s a pesky werewolf law passed that says they can be hunted, you can decide not to pass it. You’re registered as Lupin-Black, because I couldn’t decide if you’d want to scare your father, or hide him, like he did you. You can go by whichever.”

Remus looked down at the paper and then back at Sirius. “You mean it?”

Sirius smiled and nodded, pulling Remus close. “You’ll get your own income. If you want to move out one day, I’ll help you. I know you won’t want to live here forever, as soon as my mother snuffs it, we’re leaving.”

Remus looked down then back up. “To where?”

Sirius pulled Remus close and leaned in, so their faces were an inch away. “Maybe… Paris, city of love? People are more accepting there, it’s diverse and nice.”

Remus spaced out a bit before nodding. “That sounds… too good to be true, you speak French?”

“ _Oh, bien sûr, mon amour, j'ai grandi ici, après tout._ ”

Remus stared up at him, wide eyed. He slowly licked his lips and swallowed thickly. Sirius laughed and leaned into his ear, murmuring, “Ça te plaît? Je dois laisser tomber l'anglais?”

Sirius pulled Remus closer and kissed his ear. “ _Je t’aime._ ”

He picked up Remus and took him into their room, papers in hand.

“You start work tomorrow. You’re no longer a servant, you never have to serve me again.”

Remus nodded and got close to Sirius, laying on him.

“I love you, too.”

Sirius was surprised, so Remus pointed to the French dictionary on the shelf, saying, “Common phrases.”

Sirius nodded and hugged him close, tangling their legs together, Remus’ face buried in his neck.

They fell asleep like that, the possibilities for their future endless, the storms behind them.

**Author's Note:**

> I’m a phucking sadistic psychopath, I realize. This has been written for months.


End file.
